As some of you may know and most of you will probably be fascinated by, this past weekend I attended Wrestlemania XXVI in Phoenix with Mustacheer "Broph" and a few other friends. Now, I know Bill Simmons just wrote a running diary of the event, so this might be a little redundant if you've read that, but it's kind of like 'Nam, he doesn't know man! He wasn't there!
The surprises started early when we showed up to tailgate in the parking lot and ... there was barely anybody there. We were expecting a football-style tailgate crowd but nope, it was a pretty sad scene. No rowdiness, no drunkenness, no talk about nephews and whether or not they'd be attending any more games. The lack of atmosphere didn't stop us from sitting around and drinking for the next few hours, however, and when showtime rolled around we were in the only level of consciousness in which grown men can legitimately enjoy a live wrestling event.
I'm sure all of you watched Wrestlemania live on Pay-Per-View, so I won't really need to delve into results; instead, I'll just touch on some things that were interesting in person.
-The Hitman match was painful. I wanted it to be good so badly, but right from the start it was a mess. The whole thing was just a glorified beat down of Vince, and it was excruciatingly boring. At one point Hitman even sat down in the ring which made it seem like he was bored too. The atmosphere in the crowd was basically one of sadness. Everyone realized that we all probably would have been better off if Hitman had never come back, and that sucked.
-There were a few Jericho supporters near me and we all went nuts when he surprisingly won, which led to multiple, vigorous high-fives. It was kind of like being a fan of the road team.
-Batista vs. Cena was a lot of fun to be in the crowd for. I decided to back Batista, mostly because of how lame Cena is. This lead to me having a way too much fun argument with a little kid in a Cena shirt and me overreacting every time anything bad would happen to Batista. (Don't worry I didn't swear at all, and the kid's parents were laughing) Anyway, the match was better than I thought it would be, although anytime Cena makes someone tap I get very annoyed.
-I was surprised that most of the people around me were rooting for Taker over Michaels. I tried to plead Michaels' case to all of them, but most of them weren't having it. I'm not sure anybody there really believed it would be his last match, so when it ended I think the ovation wasn't quite what it could have been.
All in all, it wasn't a great Wrestlemania, but it was a lot of fun to be at.
HIGHLIGHT: Other than the obvious Taker/Michaels match, it was Jericho winning.
LOWLIGHT: Originally I thought it would be realizing that this song actually said, "Yeah this is our night," instead of "It's a see-saw night," which had been a long-held belief of all the Andersen bros. But after Sunday it was Hitman's match. Which is too bad. However, the boringness of it did lead to me doing an impression of Hitman giving an excruciatingly bland, rambling promo that lasted about 20 minutes on the ride home. I would have stopped sooner, but Mustacheer Broph's friend Matt wouldn't stop laughing. Even if only one person's liking a joke I feel like you have to run it into the ground. It's sort of like writing a post even if you're pretty sure only one person will read it, which reminds me, I hope this was a good read Finn!
Due to the INSANE popularity of last years Royal Rumble countdown post... Erik and I have decided to countdown the 10 greatest matches in Wrestlemania (it's later this month) history!
Compose yourselves.
Here's the email exchange of how it all went down. Enjoy.
ERIK:
Alright, let's do this shit!
10. Kurt Angle vs. Shawn Michaels - 21
In preparation for this list, I recently re-watched some of my favorites. What shocked me about this one was that when Michaels came out the crowd was pretty dead (and I guess we only have ourselves to blame Finn). Then I remembered that around this time Michaels was kind of wearing thin for a lot of people, there were even some audible boos, but mainly just malaise. That didn't last long. This match tore the roof off the joint (a construction nightmare that the Staples Center only recently recovered from). The crowd was progressively won over, resulting in a few Let's Go Michaels/Let's Go Angle chant battles and culminating in a huge pop after Michaels kicked out of a top-rope Angle Slam. Michaels ends up tapping after a long struggle in the ankle lock which was a genuinely surprising ending (an ending that would be cheapened a couple years later when Michaels tapped to John effing Cena at WM 23).
So there's my #10. What about you ...
MR. F
My # 10 is from Wrestlemania 3... Hulk Hogan vs. Andre the Giant
The match isn't the greatest... but it put 'Mania on the map, and if I didn't throw a FEW old school matches on here... well... jesus... I just couldn't live with myself. No I could. But... just felt symbolically, that this match should be on here.
What's you're #9?
ERIK:
I'll get to Hulk/Andre later ...
My #9
Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon - Wrestlemania X
I'm sure ladder matches had happened before this one (rarely is WWF the actual innovator of something like this) but this was definitely the first time I had ever heard of, or seen a ladder match, and it was awesome. This was a time before anyone had even been put through a table, so this qualified as the craziest thing my 8 year old eyes had ever seen (holy shit, I was only 8?). This match set the tone for every future ladder match and basically every other "hardcore" match that would take place in the from here on out. It's something that's taken for granted now, but honestly, a fucking ladder in a wrestling match? It's a strange concept, that could have easily failed, but this match made sure it didn't.
MR. F:
Yeah... I didn't want to put it on here, because it was a gimmick match... that being said, it's the starting point for all future ladders matches (including, TLCs and MIB's (Tables, Ladders and Chairs, and Money in the Bank matches, for all you noobs!) which I think we decided to leave off the list, because they're all awesome and would dominate).
My #9? Glad you asked... It's The Ultimate Warrior vs. Macho Man Randy Savage from Wrestlemania 7
Retirement Match. One of these men would never wrestle again! Ok, maybe not. But this match was pretty good for an old style with a dude who could barely wrestle. I mean c'mon... Warrior carried this thing. (that's a joke for all you HCMers out there who don't watch wrestling... so... you're probably not reading this... but Savage is still one of the more under appreciated wrestlers in history... in my... opinion... ... ok... )
Plus the ending... like 2 HUNDRED elbow drops, and the Warrior kicks out!!! Then he finishes Randy with a barrage of... um... shoulder launches? Anyway... the REAL ending has an enraged Sensational Sherry kicking the crap out of Macho, because let's face it, he just cost her her career (again, not really... Sherri, being the crafty lady that she is, hitched her wagon to the up and coming STUD that was HBK! Talk about upgrade!!! Am I right ladies?!?! Umm... nevermind). Randy is hurting, he lost his career, his lady is kicking the crap out of him... and who makes the save? His one true love Miss Elizabeth! They are reunited (after Savage asks the audience what he should do)... and even though his career his over and he will DEFINITELY never wrestle again, at least he's found true love. There were legitimate tears shown throughout the crowd (and I'm not talking about the ones you shed earlier after Randy lost). There was a normal housewife type, some kid... aaaaand....
ERIK:
(Erik really dropped the ball here. I was hoping he'd say THE SOBBING TRANSEXUAL IN RAIN GEAR!!! But he didn't... bad job by you Erik)
I love Warrior as much as the next guy, in fact, more than the next guy, unless of course the next guy is actually Warrior himself. But anyway, this one didn't make my list because of the actual ending. Shoulder blocks? Really Warrior? You couldn't give us the gorilla press? And the one-foot pin still rubs me the wrong way. Anyhow, let's move on:
8. Hulk Hogan vs. Andre the Giant - Wrestlemania III
I put this a little higher than you, and it makes my list for basically the same reasons. It wasn't so much about the match as it was the spectacle. I also have a rule that any match that can draw 90,000+ makes the top 8. Let's be honest, the actual match is crap, but what did you expect from these two? Saying this match is boring in comparison to today's matches isn't fair. It's like saying the Luke/Vader lightsaber fights were boring. Sure they look tame now but at the time they were mesmerizing.
I guess we already have you thoughts on this one, what's your # 8?
MR. F:
#8 Stone Cold Steve Austin vs The Rock (No. 3) @ Wrestlemania 19 in Seattle
Seattle had to make this list, and it was either this, or HBK vs Jericho (sorry Angle/Lesnar... maybe if you hit that shooting star press). The HBK/Jericho made my just missed list, and probably just because HBK is on here enough.
The Austin/Rock feud will go down as one of the top 5, maybe 2 or 3 feuds of all time, and this was the culmination, with The Rock finally getting the upper hand. Probably the loudest the crowd was all night, and I even saw some kid changing t-shirts with the eb and flow of the match. One second the Rock was up and he had that Tshirt on, the next it was Austin! Truly Amazing!
Plus this Austin's last match... so that's pretty cool!
We'll hear from these two again on my list BTW (stands for bet the world ... on that)
What's #7?
ERIK:
That one didn't make my list, but yes it was a great match, made greater by the fact that Austin was in the hospital the night before feeling like he was going to die apparently.
Anyway, remember earlier when I said I really liked Warrior?
7. Ultimate Warrior vs. Hulk Hogan - Wrestlemania VI
Once again, not the greatest technical wrestling match, but c'mon, it was Hogan and Warrior, you wanna talk about heat? These mother effers had heat! The idea for this match was pretty revolutionary: the two biggest faces in the company fighting each other for both the World AND Intercontinental titles. And it was also historical because Hogan lost clean, which hadn't happened up to this point. Also, this one has sentimental value for me because it was far and away my favorite match as a kid. It's tough to say if this one topped there re-match at Halloween Havoc '98 ... What's that? We've decided to forget that ever happend? Ok, fine by me. (I actually just looked it up to make sure '98 was correct, and the cover of the VHS says "Wrestling's Most Terrifying Event" Yep, sounds about right.)
I'm guessing this one didn't make your list, but then again I'm not entirely sure, what's the verdict?
MR. F:
You named all the right reasons for that Warrior/Hogan match... it JUST missed my list... like number 11 probably.
My #7 is also from the Seattle Wrestlemania. Booker T vs Triple H
Both of these guys just pushed each other to the limit! Each man was exhausted, from what seemed like the opening bell.
Just kidding, unfortunately that match was a steaming pile of horse crap.
My real # 7 is Shawn Michaels vs. Bret Hart, Iron Man Match, from Wrestlemania 12
Just a great match. 1 hour and change, and it doesn't have too many lulls. Also, one of the few Mania matches that HBK actually wins.... although... I think Hitman has a legitimate gripe here. Overtime rules should have been in place before the match began. I mean.... he had the best submission hold in wrestling, the Sharpshooter, locked in, in the middle of the ring! He RELEASED the hold because the match "ended". If he never has to release the hold HBK either passes out from the pain (Bret wins) or HBK taps (Bret wins again). And this is coming from a huge HBK fan. And you know this.... maaaaan.
#6?
ERIK:
That's a good point. It would have worked out better for Hitman if they had gone with Piper's original time suggestion ... "NO LIMIT!" I'll get to this match when it shows up on my list.
6. Randy Savage vs. Ricky Steamboat - Wrestlemania III
I feel the same way about this match as I do the aforementioned ladder match; there have been matches like this one that may have been better, but this one was the first (at least on that big of a stage). This match proved that you didn't need to put two huge dudes in a ring to make it a big-time match, in fact, most of the time it was a hell of a lot more entertaining when that wasn't the case. (A concept that the WWE seemed to forget at times, resulting in the Great Khali title reign.) Another telling factor is that this is a lot of wrestler's favorite match, and since we agreed that #6 would be our "Match with the Most Telling Factors" spot, I'll have to put it here.
Did this one make your list? I think I remember you saying it was overrated at one point, but 6 seems about right to me.
MR.F:
Yep.... every time I try to watch it, I just end up fast forwarding. Maybe if I had seen it live. Matches like that tend to resonate more if you watched them live for the first time.
My #6 is Bret the Hitman Hart v Stone Cold Steve Austin @ Wrestlemania (help) in an I-Quit match. Just because of Kenny Shamrock. His first official involvement in a match. A referee. Just kidding. Although, all things considered, Ken Shamrock was a pretty great pro-wrestler, considering he was just crossing over.
Anyway... back to the match. It's pretty iconic... and although it really represents the slippery slope that Bret was sliding down... the match was still cool and it made Stone Cold into a bright shinging star. Only instead of whipping his dick out (lame Boogie Nights ref.) he just passed out from the pain of the sharpshooter (sort of like HBK would have if they;d let my last match keep going) with blood running down his face. Austin screaming out in pain with the blood running down his face and over his teeth is one of the more memorable shots in Wrestlemania (or Pro Wrestling even) history.
Your #5? (By the way, I'm at work so I don't remember my #5 off the top of my head).
ERIK:
I'm gonna get to that match later ... believe me man, I will.
#5. Shawn Michaels vs. Steve Austin - Wrestlemania XIV
What's that? Too low you say? Well, initially I would agree, but the last time I re-watched it I wasn't as impressed as I remember being in the past. It might have something to do with Michaels coming back and wrestling for 6+ years, making this no longer his last match. And not only that, but I feel like he's topped this performance at least once at 'Mania since then (SPOILER ALERT!!! Oh, no one cares? Not even you Foy?)
BUT let's look at the positives. First of all, it's a very entertaining match between an established, all-time great heel and a skyrocketing face, basically the perfect set-up for a 'Mania title match. Secondly, Michaels had to gut the match out with what a appeared to be a near-crippling back injury. Third, Mike Tyson was there! Oh, wait that's actually a negative. He taints the match at the end with his fast count, and is one of the reasons this only makes #5 for me.
I believe you have this one higher, so what's your #5?
MR.F:
Yep.... it was my #1. But for some of the reasons you just mentioned, I probably ought to change the list. You convinced me. In fact (minor spoiler alert), you convinced me to drop my #2 as well... and now we have a new #1.
I did/do still love that match though. HBK is broken and giving it his all. Also, Stone Cold becomes the biggest thing in wrestling... possibly of all time. It's him and Hogan neck and neck for the 1 and 2 spot with the Rock a close 3rd.
Anyway, my #5 is the triple threat main event from 'Mania 20... Triple H vs HBK vs The Crippler Chris Benoit.
I won't make any jokes or really even bring up Benoit's unfortunate demise. But this is a perfect triple threat match and the ending is one of my all-time faves. HBK is out of the picture (I think he crotched himself after missing Sweet Chin Music and then someone dumped him out and then Benoit locks in the crossface on HHH. He's in it for a loooong time and you think he's about the break it and he rolls out, but Benoit rolls through... and then HHH taps. Big win. Eddy Guerrero comes out to celebrate with him. Pretty tragic now that I think about it.
What's your #4?
ERIK:
That's a great match that didn't make my list. Why? HHH's white boots. It's as simple as that. Well, alright not really, jay slash kay. I don't know why, but it just didn't crack the top ten.
#4 The Rock vs. Hollywood Hulk Hogan - Wrestlemania X8
The main reason I have it this high is the atmosphere that enveloped the match. Going into it Hogan was a full-blown heel and the Rock was as popular as ever. But there were a couple interesting factors: 1. This was Hogan's first real match with the WWE in almost 9 years (Apparently it takes that long to rehab face burns from a close-range exploding camera flash). 2. The match was taking place in Canada. The canucks play by their own rules when it comes to football and rooting for wrestlers, but the football part isn't as important to this conversation. So, what exactly would the crowd sound like? When Hogan walked down the aisle it was clear that he had a considerable following. As the two stared each other down before the match there were loud Hogan chants that made each wrestler look towards the crowd in disbelief. And then, when Hogan threw The Rock to the ground out of the opening grapple the crowd went wild; a few seconds later as he commenced his classic flexing the place exploded. Things were being thrown about in the crowd that was now a sea of flailing arms and general madness. It legitimately may be the most amazing thing I've seen as a wrestling fan, and it was the result of a shove to the ground.
The match itself is more or less a vintage Hogan bout, complete with a Hulk-up at about the 15 minute mark. It's at this point that the crowd gets as loud as, if not louder than, their opening effort. At one point, as Hogan blocks a punch and returns fire with one of his own you can actually see the Rock's eyes dart to the big screen at the end of the entrance; it's as if he's watching the match himself, maybe in disbelief that he's actually fighting Hulk Hogan. I think that kind of mirrors the crowd's attitude and explains their fervor. Hulk Hogan had turned back the clock, but not just 9 years but 15 years, right in the heart of Hulkamania, and the fans in attendance couldn't believe what they were seeing.
Why wasn't it higher than 4? Well, like I said, it's a typical Hogan match which means not too much in the way of actual good wrestling. Also, I know it was a better ending to have The Rock win, but I have to think I'd like it more if Hogan had won.
This has to be on your list right?
MR. F:
Ok... Erik... settle down... maybe sit the next few picks out...
Actually, I had this match listed in the exact same spot... but moved it to #2 after your last comments, and these comments. It was awesome. I thought it was the best Hogan matchof all time, and right up there for the Rock. Electric. I wish more of the crowd had been for The Rock... just to even things out. Although, correct me if I'm wrong, I believe he did get a pretty good pop when he won. Almost, like the crowd was saying... yeaaaah, we knew you'd win, and we're glad, but this Hogan comeback is too rad not to go crazy for. Right?
So... to reiterate This was my 2nd greatest match up of all time, and my 4th was the HBK/Austin match up.
ERIK:
#3. Shawn Michaels vs. The Undertaker - Wrestlemania XXV
Two living legends put on hands-down the best match of the night despite the fact that they're both 40+. One of Michaels best performances ever, and definitely Taker's. There was good drama in this match because for the first time in years it felt like Taker's streak might actually end. When it comes to Mania, the streak carries more weight than either of the titles at this point, so when someone has legit shot at breaking it, the tension is high. Let's be honest, a lot of Taker's opponents have been duds:
-Snuka -Giant Gonzalez -King Kong Bundy -Big Bossman -Big Show & Prince Albert -Mark Henry
Michaels is the highest caliber Mania opponent there is, so this match was poised to be great before it started. It delivered on that promise with a lot of back-and-forth action and plenty of big spots, including Taker jumping out of the ring and landing directly on his head (Mainly due to a "cameraman" failing to break his fall. Think that jobber ever got another call?) My favorite moment in the match is when Taker catches Michaels, who is skinning the cat, and tombstones him, only to have Michaels kick out. Taker just lays on top of Michaels, exhausted and stunned. It basically sold the whole match because Taker has been pronounced dead on multiple occasions and should theoretically have no emotions, but this got to him.
MR.F:
Nice job. But this is the greatest match in Wrestlemania's history. My #1. For all the reasons you listed. I can't really add too much. It's an old school match that is actually watchable. Feels weird picking a match from LAST years 'Mania... cuz wrestling sucks now... but going down my list this is just how it worked out.
My #3 is HBK vs Ric Flair w/ Flair's career on the line.
Debatably the two greatest TOTAL package (sorry Luger) wrestlers of all time. One way past his prime (Flair) but the other ... I mean you'd think he's past... but HBK keeps hitting homeruns every 'Mania. The match is pretty standard, but the ending is great. HBK has Flair beat, but he can't pin cuz he doesn't want to end the "greatest career" of all time. In his moment of weakness, Flair slaps on the figure four and almost gets Michaels to tap. Michaels escapes... batters Flair and then Flair is done... slowly climbs to his feet his dukes up, saying "C'mon, C'mon..." basically accepting that he's done for and Michaels mouths "I'm sorry" super kicks his head off and pins him. Flair immediately starts sobbing (which is weird because shouldn't he be unconcious?). Anyway... pretty sissy stuff really, but it was awesome. The only thing that taints this moment is that Flair wrestled again and looks like it'll be on pretty large scale in TNA. What a shit head. Then I'll have to drop this pretty far down.
What's your #2?
ERIK:
I left the Flair/Michaels match off my list. I loved the match, and the ending was truly great, I guess I just don't remember enough from the rest of the match to put it on here.
#2. Shawn Michaels vs. Bret Hart - Wrestlemania XII
You already covered this one when you rated it too low at #7. It wasn't the most exciting match on the list, in fact, the first 15 minutes or so are pretty boring with both guys trading headlocks for the most part. But the action picks up from there. The reason I put it this high is because it was an hour long! I feel like it desrves our respect. After having seen other Iron Man matches since, it seems even more unbelievable that they would decide to go the full hour without one fall being recorded. Of course, with Michaels being the dickhead that he was back then there's a good chance that he refused to drop even one fall, which may be the reason they did it that way.
While I'm on Michaels, his Wrestlemania career is pretty amazing. Like I mentioned earlier, his career was over after XIV, only two years after winning his first WWF championship, and he was already considered one of the best ever. THEN he comes back about four and a half years later and proceeds to put on, arguably, the best match at every Wrestlemania since. And if we go back even further he's had the best match at the last 11 Mania's he's wrestled at.
X. vs. Ramon (Ladder Match) - YES XI. vs. Diesel - YES XII. vs. Hitman - YES XIII. (LOST HIS SMILE) XIV. vs. Austin - YES XV. - X8 RETIRED XIX vs. Jericho - Maybe (Could also argue Rock vs. Austin or Angle vs. Lesnar) XX vs. Benoit vs. HHH - YES 21 vs. Angle - YES 22 vs. Vince - Maybe (Could also argue Foley vs. Edge or Angle vs. Rey vs. Orton) 23 vs. Cena - YES XXIV vs. Flair - YES XXV vs. Undertaker - YES
And that's not even taking into account that his match at IX against Tatanka may have been the bestone there. Unfortunately, all copies of that event have been destroyed to protect the innocent. But that's really incredible. The guy retires as one of the best ever, then comes back and steals the show at 7 consecutive Manias. Is it even an argument now that he's the best ever? I say no.
What do you think?
MR. F:
There's no argument here. I don't even think it's close. Some will say Flair. But those people are idiots. Flair can't touch Michaels... in any arena. Pun intended.
We've listed all my matches and yours... I'm guessing, but you haven't revealed your #1 so let's hear it... then you've inspired a new list... not greatest wrestlers of all time, but greates Mania performers of all time! IN fact I'm really over this list and just want to get to the next one. Kidding... sort of... let's hear your #1 and then a recap with some just misses and honorable mentions.
What's your #1?
ERIK:
#1. Bret Hart vs. Steve Austin - Wrestlemania 13
I enjoy this match, like many on my list, more for the angle surrounding it and the crowd reaction during the match. Going into the match these two were headed in opposite directions. Hitman had returned 4 months earlier to find that things weren't the way he left them, thanks in large part to his main antagonist Stone Cold Steve Austin. Austin was steadily gaining popularity even though his character had made little to no change since the last time the two fought at Survivor Series, when he was clearly the heel. Hitman's popularity was waining even though he was doing the same thing he'd done for years that made him one of the most popular wrestlers in the biz (told you I'd use it again). It reminds me of a line in "Elderly Woman Behind a Counter in a Small Town," by popular rock band Pearl Jam (ever heard of these guys? You should check 'em out big bro). The line says, "I changed by not changing at all.," and I think it pretty much sums up what was happening here. The characters hadn't changed, but what the fans' were looking for had.
As for the match, it's pretty much chaos from the get go. Austin tackles Hitman even before the bell, and after that there's no looking back. As you mentioned, the bloody-faced, screaming Austin is one of the iconic moments in Mania history, with the crowd chanting his name while he struggled to stay consicous in the Sharpshooter. At the start of the match these two were meeting in the middle in terms of popularity, by the end of it, however, Austin was well on his way to becoming one of the two most popular wrestlers ever, and Hitman was headed towards a nice run as a heel followed by his historic departure from the WWF. This match was a watershed moment in the league's history, and that's why it's my #1.
MR. F:
Well done. I've compiled our lists and assigned a # value and added them all up, (1 pt for 10, 2 pts for 9th, etc.) We had 14 different matches so these four just didn't make the top 10:
HBK vs Angle, Warrior vs Macho, HBK vs Razor (although if I hadn't taken a stand on ladder matches it would have been much higher), & Austin Rock.
The Top 10 Greatest Matches in Wrestlemania History:
10. The Ultimate Warrior vs. Hulk Hogan
9. Hulk Hogan vs. Andre the Giant
8. Ricky Steamboat vs. The Macho Man Randy Savage
7. Chris Benoit vs. Triple H vs. The Heartbreak Kid Shawn Michaels
6. The Heartbreak Kid Shawn Michaels vs. Ric Flair
5. Stone Cold Steve Austin vs. The Heartbreak Kid Shawn Michaels
4. The Heartbreak Kid Shawn Michaels vs. Bret the Hitman Hart
3. Bret the Hitman Hart vs. Stone Cold Steve Austin
2. The Rock vs. Hollywood Hulk Hogan
1. The Heartbreak Kid Shawn Michaels vs. The Undertaker
We did it. We really did it.
Now... we could go statistically and add up the competitors pt totals and pick a greatest performers list of all time... but we gotta couple more weeks, how about another countdown?
It's upon us again, later this month... THE ROYAL RUMBLE!!! I'll go through a brief analysis of who's got what it takes to win this year a little later on, but here's last year's EPIC break down of Rumbles past by yours truly and local legend Erik...
(I just read this whole thing again, and not to toot my own horn, but it's great stuff. If you like Pro-Wrestling at all, you'll enjoy reading it. And if you don't... well I've got some bad advice for you little buddy!"
It’s just about time for the greatest sporting event of the year.
That’s right… My favorite and every wrestling fan’s favorite event of the year (I’ll listen to arguments for Wrestlemania. But that’s it) is deserving of a top 10 list. Interestingly enough, Erik was thinking the exact same thing. I received the following email:
Erik:
Hey, I was planning on writing a top ten Rumbles post on Cotto, but I assumed you'd probably be gearing up for the same thing. So anyway, you want to collaborate on this thing?
To which I replied:
Finn:
Yes
We exchanged emails over the course of the next few days and came up with a couple of top ten lists… and if you’re lucky we might combine them into one perfect list to worship. You’re welcome Foy. Now the nightmares can stop.
Here it goes…
Erik: Alright, well how about I give you my ten and you give me yours? I'll start with #10 and we alternate.
Finn:
Sounds GREAT!!! But this will take some research and a LOT of time. Good thing we still have 18 days until the next one. What are our judging criteria?
I say the following should be taken into consideration in no particular order (of course, you judge however you would like): - #'s 1 and 2 and #30 - Who won the Rumble - The final four - Any dominating Rumble performances that year? - Awesome spots - Laugh out loud moments - If it was just fuckin' cool or not Thoughts?
Erik:
That's pretty much exactly what I was thinking. Although, #30 isn't a big stickler for me. Overall rhythm is a factor, but I think that's what you're getting at with "Is it just fuckin' cool." So once I finalize my list I'll send you #10.
(I'm breaking this up all week in anticipation of Sunday's big event... you're all invited. And after reading all 45 of these Rumble countdown posts, you'll e just as JAZZED for the event as we are... More to come tonight.)
And finally... some old promos to get you EVEN MORE amped!!!
Erik:
Alright, let's do it to it, let's get this party started. And now for the Rumble that drew #10!
.......1989 Winner: Big John Studd Final 4: Studd, Ted DiBiase, Akeem, Rick Martel (Strike Force) #1 & 2: Ax & Smash #30: DiBiase The first real Rumble gets on my list at number 10. There was nothing overwhelmingly great about this Rumble, but by getting #10 I'm basically just saying it was better than half of them. What sells me on this one is the overall storyline: Ted DiBiase had bought #30 and the help of the TwinTowers and was poised to steal the Rumble. Of course, he didn't and Big John Studd won, which was kind of lame, which is why it's no higher than 10. Also, the Ax and Smash drawing #1 & 2 was pretty memorable, with probably the best part being their pre-match selections:
Smash (Looks at the number he's just drawn): It's gonna be a long night. Ax (Looks at his): You said it.
Or something along those lines. Their double-team on Andre was good, along with Andre eliminating himself due to his fear of Damien. Another lasting moment was Hogan's "accidental" elimination of Macho Man, stoking the flames of a feud that would culminate in the most homo-erotic World title match ever at WrestleMania V. Also, Hogan was eliminated with help from the outside establishing a standard for the only way he could possibly not win a Royal Rumble.
Alright, the lists are underway. Whaddaya got big bro?
Finn:
Strong #10, if not just a liiiiiittle predictable.I don’t have much to add on that one, except this:Smash actually says: “Me too”.Bit of an easter egg to the kids paying attention at home.Smash was # 2 later that night.
My # 10 is 1994
Winner:Bret Hart / Lex Luger
Final 4: Bret Hart, Lex Luger, Shawn Michaels, and Fatu (One of these things does not belong here…. One of these things is not the same)
#1 & #2: Scott Steiner and Samu(Awful… just awful)
#30 Adam Bomb (he doesn’t have that good of an arm)
(quick side noet:This is the infamous PPV where Owen Hart tells Bret he “Kicked his leg out of his leg”)
There are a LOT of negatives about this rumble, like the first two dudes coming in followed by the mysterious Kwang and a sedated Rick Steiner (seriously, what the fuck was his problem that night).The beginning of this Rumble is painfully boring, even with the Diesel domination.Capped off by an unforgivable barely caught weak elimination of Macho Man Randy Savage.Although Backlund almost screwed everything up by dumping Diesel.That would have been funny.
What saves this Rumble for me is the drama of whether or not Hitman would be able to compete, and when he does he wins (with Lex, who’s paralyzed right now, so I’ll go easy).I especially oved when they cut off Luger’s music and Hitman’s starts.He turns around and yells “alright!!!”.Maybe the last time Bret was truly happy.
That’s what I got.What’s your number 9?
Erik:
…
Finn:
Okay... got tired of waiting. So here's my #9... 2004
Winner: Chris Benoit Final 4: Chris Benoit, Big Show, Kurt Angle, Chris Jericho #1 and #2: Chris Benoit and Randy Orton #30: Gooooooldberg
Chris Benoit goes from # 1 to win it all. I wish he'd come in at 4 to cross another number off the list, but I digress... There's the cool #1 vs #2 that carries the first half of the Rumble until Mick Foley appears as a surprise entrant eliminating Orton. Then the end has some great stuff. It's the Big Show stand... he takes finishing moves from Jericho, RVD, Cena, Angle and Benoit, then rallies back to the finals, (that may be the best group of pure wrestling talent in a final group). Then we get to possible the best final elimination in the history of the Rumble. Not the best Final 4 (but close), not the best finals, but the best actual elimination. Benoit is about to be chokeslammed out of the ring when he reverses into a (gulp) choke hold and drag Show out of the ring. All in all, it was a kil... I can't do it.
What's # 9 for you?
Erik:
Wow, I'm surprised you put '04 that low, considering your strange post-murder appreciation for Benoit. And if we're in the business of correcting quotes, doesn't Hitman shout "Yeeeeeeaaaaaaasssss." as he turns around? I guess you've probably seen it more recently, but considering this was a staple of my childhood, I think I should remember. Also, if you're bringing up Kwang, I should tell you that my sources inform me that he was replacing Ludwig Borga. Anyhow, here's the Rumble that drew #9. ......2002 Winner: HHH Final Four: HHH, Kurt Angle, Mr. Perfect, Stone Cold Steve Austin #1 & 2: Rikishi & Goldust #30: Booker T
Ok, obviously #1 & 2 suck, they're stupid. And I've never been a hug Booker T fan, so #30 isn't a thrill for me. But there are a few great things about this Rumble. First is the Undertaker's domination. I checked the stats, and he's only in there for about 8 minutes. I've never seen anybody have a more productive 8 minutes without the help of Jamie Brinkus. 'Taker runs through everyone, and then gets eliminated by Maven out of nowhere, which was a genuinely good moment because it actually caught you off guard, which is tough to do at this point. Of course, this was followed by the Deadman taking him to the learning tree for the next hour. (Is it racist to say that an older white man took a rambunctious young black man to a tree?)
The second great aspect is the return of Mr. Perfect. He lasts all the way until the final 3, even going past Austin who gets dumped right before him. And even though you knew that a returning HHH was going to win, you had to be rooting for Perfect. In fact, I think Mr. Perfect actually got a Perfect-plex off on him, which elicited a huge pop from this smart mark.
This Rumble can be no higher because, as I mentioned before, it was obvious that HHH was going to win, and he did that extremely lame HHH-up, arms in the air move before he dumped Angle. Terrible, just terrible.
Alright, who goes for #8 now, you or I? I mean you jumped the gun on 9, so where do we go?
Finn:
Sorry to burst your bubble but no he says, "Alright" . Look it shocked me too.
Your # 9 is good. Too good. In fact I had it ranked as the #6 Rumble of all time... and here's why:
It had four returning superstars: Godfather (eh), Val Venis (eh), Goldust (he actually got a pretty good pop, and since it was his return the #2 spot wasn't as lame as you think), and Mr. Perfect.
It was great to Perfect in the ring again, and after watching it last night, right when he comes out he pumps his fist to the pop and yells "Fuck yeah, man!". Plus he might have been drunk. No kidding.
It's got one of the best final fours ever, and a cool showdown moment for Austin and Triple H (right before Hurricane comes in and tries to double chokeslam them).
But the part the extra stuff that makes this a great Rumble for me was a sequence in about the 2 quarter of the match where the Taker is taking on the Hardy's and Lita comes in (really a shame what happened to her) and they kick the shit out of Taker for a while. The Deadman ultimately eliminates them both, but only to de dropkicked form behind out of the ring by Maven. Maven is lame. But that was a classic Rumbled moment.
That brings us to #8. My # 8 is the 1997 Rumble. Winner: Steve Austin Final 4: Austin, Hitman, Vader and Taker 1 & 2: Crush and Ahmed Johnson (yuck and fuck) 30: Deadman
This Rumble is where Austin makes his first big leap towards superstardom. There's good moments of Austin waiting in the ring looking at his watch and doing pushups, and later freaking out when it's the Hitman's music (out of character, but who cares). Plus there's the Latin Lover's entrance:
Jim Ross: "It's the Latin Lover"
Vince McMahon: " It certainly is"
Something you'd like to get off your chest Vince? Anyway... Also the second year in a row the King was uppercutted over the top ropes (they also did the lame Takes a King to know a King line that McMahon ruined)
Then there's the classic final ring after # 30 comes in (and they get rid of Hogman and Flash Funk). Were left with the final 4 AND Rocky Maivia, Diesel (Kane), Mankind and Terry Funk.
What's your 8?
Erik:
Ok, well just to clear things up, I had 2004 at #5 on my list. The idea of someone winning from the #1 spot had already been done before, but a guy like Benoit was the perfect person to do it with if you were gonna do it again. I mean if somebody's gonna go all the way with something, Benoit's your guy (Oh no).
The ending is what really sells me on this Rumble though. Angle has Show locked into the ankle lock and Big Show brilliantly rolls over the ropes to eliminate him. As a side note, why would Angle be using the Ankle lock in the Rumble? Logically it doesn't make sense. You're gonna take away the Big Show's legs? If he can't stand up how the hell are you gonna get him over the rope? Anyhow, Benoit's elimination of Big Show may be the best final elimination in the history of Rumbles. It was actually somewhat believable and it really epitomized Benoit's effort. As terrible as Benoit's legacy has become, I have to give credit where it's due. It was finally his main event push, and they gave it to him in the greatest way possible. And that's why I gave this Rumble a high ranking.
Ok, you've got 1997 at #8, well I have to disagree with you here. I have it all the way up at #3. It would possibly top my list if the roster weren't so terrible and unrecognizable. I mean, there were around 7 or 8 guys that were not WWF wrestlers, what's the point?
My first reason for having it so high is the great push that Austin got with this Rumble. This was right at the time where fans were starting to get on board with him, and he was on the verge of being a main-eventer, which put him in the perfect spot to win the Rumble.
Secondly, there was a unique ending. Of course, Austin cheated, but that's what made it cool.
Thirdly, the sequence where Austin is dominating the Rumble is one of my favorite moments ever. He ends up the only guy in the ring, eliminates a couple guys who come down after that, and is left sitting on the top turnbuckle looking at his watch. (I always love when it's about halfway through and there's only one guy in the ring.) Then Hitman's music hits. Austin looks up shocked. He was totally confident until this moment, and now he knows he's got a real fight on his hands. It was awesome, they paced it perfectly so that this was right in the middle, which set up the rest of the Rumble. Anyway, those are my thoughts.
Here's the Rumble that drew #8
....2008
Winner: John Cena Final 4: Cena, HHH, Batista, Kane #1 & 2: Undertaker & Shawn Michaels #30: Cena Yeah, I know, somewhat of a shocker, but hey, anything can happen in the WWF. Obviously, 1 and 2 are great, even if they're completely unbelievable. If I remember correctly, the Rumble itself was pretty enjoyable throughout. But the real reason i put it on the list is the ending. We knew there was a "mystery entrant" and by the time it got to #30 we knew he was coming out next. In the back of my mind I was thinking "It can't be Cena can it? He's gone for like 4 more months right? Yeah it can't be him, well who's it gonna be?" Then the countdown ends and : Ba ba da dum Ba ba da dum! "Noooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!! Damn it!"
Look I hate Cena pretty hard, but when he came through the curtain the hate turned into that rare type of "You son of a bitch" hatred where you can't help but crack a smile. I knew he would win the second I saw him, and I didn't really mind at that point. It was such a surprise that I felt like I'd got my moneys worth.
Also, the final 3 was comprised of the most popular wrestlers in the business which made the MSG crowd pretty great.
Finn:
Great thoughts on the 97 and 04 Rumbles, very similar to my thoughts… you did read my thoughts, right?Anyway, it looks like we agree on why the Rumbles were great just not on their order in the top 10.Oh well.
And… good call on the ’08 Rumble, I agree with everything you have there.I was actually excited to see Cena, which is the first time that’s happened since the Seattle Wrestlemania.There were a couple of moments that also stood out:Shelton Benjamin’s leap onto the turnbuckle and getting Morrison and Miz (not eliminating, but that would’ve been cool).Unfortunately he got superkicked out of the wring 30 seconds(or less) later.You take what you can get from Benjamin in the WWE.There was also the Snuka/Piper stuff, and the final three showdown was great.All three have a staredown and do their respective taunts, culminating in two DX crotchchops before they go at it.
It was a great Rumble… you just had it one spot too low.Coincidentally I had it at #7… so no new email from me.Also, we already went over my #6, it was ’02 HHH.
So let’s here your # 7 and #6.
---------------------------------
Erik:
The Rumble who drew #7 (by the way I'm not stopping this gimmick.)
.....1990
Winner: Hulk Hogan Final Four: Hogan, Mr. Perfect, Rick Rude, Hercules #1 & 2: Ted DiBiase & Koko B. Ware #30: Mr. Perfect
This is #7 strictly for the greatest showdown in Rumble history: DiBiase and Janetty. And also there's the other good one between Hogan and Warrior. Both of them were tearing through Rumble until they were the only two men left in the ring. When the crowd realized it they went apeshit. Of course, there were no real moves to be done, so they looked at each other for a while then ran perpendicular routes across the ring culminating in a double clothesline. And who comes out next to reap the benefits? That's right, The Barbarian. The 3rd most popular wrestler at the time (In my opinion at least). This is followed by Rick Rude saying "Screw it" and entering the ring a minute early. A crime for which there was no reprimand.
Anyway, this Rumble was the precursor to the Ultimate Challenge. While I know it wasn't a technically flawless match, it was my favorite as a fresh-faced young boy who knew no more about the sport than what he'd learned from his Wrestlin' Buddies and action figures; so it has a a soft spot in my heart.
Finn:
Yeah this was a good Rumble for all the reasons you mentioned, but it's probably my third least favorite for the simple fact that my two favorite pro wrestlers (Koko B. Ware and Marty Janetty were quickly and embarrassingly eliminated by DiBiase at the very beginning of the Rumble. Not to mention my 4th favorite wrestler, (3rd was Brutus the Barber Beefcake for those scoring at home) Shawn Michaels entered late and was ousted in under 1 minute by the Warrior during that house cleaning moment you mentioned earlier in preparation of the Warrior / Hogan showdown. It's like Vinny Mac had it out for me personally: "Hey, I hear there's this kid watching the Rumble this year... some little shit in MillCreek Washington named Finn. Let's see if we can make him cry." Anyway that sucked. Still waiting on your 6th.
Erik:
And now the Rumble who drew #6:
......2001
Winner: Stone Cold Steve Austin Final Four: Austin, Kane, The Rock, Billy Gunn #1 & 2: Jeff Hardy & Bull Buchanan #30: Rikishi
This was originally in a higher slot. My thinking being any Rumble featuring Sounders minority owner Drew Carey and a final four appearance from Monty Sopp has to be in the top 5. But with Drew Carey ruining the greatest ending ever on Price is Right, I realized it has to be a little lower.
The beginning of the Rumble was dominated by Kane, and it was pretty exciting stuff including Kane's encounter with Carey that ended when Raven came to Drew's rescue.
Raven? Why does he ... nevermind, it's not worth trying to figure out. Anyway, here's how Wikipedia explains Carey's elimination: "This gave Carey the opportunity to eliminate himself safely and do high-fives to the fans." The Rock comes in at #13 slowing down Kane and setting up the rest of the Rumble.
The final 3 is awesome, with Kane and the Rock exhausted in their corners, and a bloodied Austin sitting in his. Stone Cold pulls a "Hogan" elimination on the Rock, setting up their match at 'Mania X-Seven. Then he dumps Kane, who at this point is without question the greatest Rumble performer ever who has not won the whole thing.
Finn:
This one didn’t make my list, but not because it’s not a great Rumble, it’s just THERE’S THAT MANY GREAT RUMBLES!!!
I’ll have to rewatch this one, and I’ll probably regret not putting it on my list.Kane’s performance was awesome and he deserved to win.
So… you’re getting wiki help?That’s fine cuz I;ve got the DVD’s to review, but could you do me a favor and see who’s appeared in the most final fours?It’s gotta be Kane, Taker, Michaels, or Austin… although Hogan was in a few and so was Macho… WHO IS IT?!?!?
Anyway… I’ve got my #5 ready… and the winner IS… (trying to get a little gimmick going of my own)
2007!
Winner:The Undertaker (finally gets one)
Final 4: Taker, Michaels, Randy Orton and Edge (It’s impossible to pick a greatest final 4 so I’ll stop trying, but this one is up there.)
#1 &2: Flair and Finlay (ummm... I guess they were taking a break from the young and exciting wrestlers that could carry the match at the beginning.)
#30: Deadman (finally # 30 wins one!!!)
Despite a terrible spot where the Great Kahli eliminates just about every good wrestler in the WWE… this one gets a high ranking for the fantastic Final 4 and finish.
Just a great sequence where Michaels is laid out on the outside, and Rated RKO are about to deliver a con-chair-to to the Deadman.Michaels slides in as Orton charges and he is backdropped to the outside, and then Edge swings and misses with the chair and is Sweet Chin Music-ed to the outside, and Michaels collapses in the ring.
Two men left, the biggest legends left In the WWE, and then Taker does his classic sit up, and Michaels does his kick up.No jokes, it was just great.Then they go back and forth for a bit, in the greatest “match” between and last two men standing at the end… I think.Not to mention it was a Texas based Rumble with both guys being Texas natives at the end (crowd was slightly in favor of Michaels).Great Rumble.
And… since I think you said the ’04 Rumble was your # 5, that brings us to the 4’s… and since I’m so red hot right now I’ll keep going.
My # 4 is…
2000 Rumble.
Winner: The Rock (yeah, yeah, yeah, disputed, didn’t happen at the PPV so didn’t happen here)
Final 4: The Rock, Big Show, Kane, and X-Pac (2nd guy to cheat in the Rumble, he didn’t get quite the results that Austin did)
# 1 & 2: D-Lo and Grand Masta Sexay (This was lame, but it did lead to a cheesy but memorable Too Cool dance off in the middle of the Rumble… and it was REAL TO ME DAMMNIT)
#30:X-Pac
This was an awesome total card (which doesn’t count I know) but it’s provbably why I remember it so fondly.Tazz vs Angle, Hardyz vs Dudleyz.Great stuff.
Two neat Rumble things for me were the surprise return of Backlund (I’ll let Pete comment on this) and Road Dogg employing a strategy I always thought more people should employ. He grabbed the bottom rope, wrapped himself around it.
The thing that makes this Rumble great were the run ins form the Mean Street Posse and Kaientati (sp?) they resulted in a HUGE face smack against the mats on Taka… might have ended his career… has anyone SEEN him since?And there was Pete Gas just EATING it on the bottom rope when he tried to slide in.
You know… I ranked this way to high.I’m sorry.I want to change my list a bit when we’re done.
Ok, so let’s here your # 4.
Erik:
As for the Final 4 stats, Austin has the most with 5, but that includes 3 wins. Michaels has 4, but that's with 2 wins. Kane has 4 with no wins. Maybe we should start calling him Ben Howland ... ouch, I am such a bitch.
I have to say I don't have either of those Rumbles in my top 10. 2000 just doesn't stand out. As for 2007, before the awesome ending, I remember thinking "This is one of the worst Rumbles ever," due in large part to the Khali fiasco.
Well, the NCAA has it's final 4, and so do I. Now the Rumble who drew #4:
....1998 Winner: Stone Cold Steve Austin Final 4: Austin, The Rock, Farrooq, Dude Love #1 & 2: Cactus Jack & Chainsaw Charlie #30: Vader
This Rumble was a lot of fun, beginning with Cactus and Chainsaw getting all sorts of hardcore, there was also apperances by all 3 faces of Foley (what a cheater) and the ongoing storyline of when Austin was going to show up. The only problem I have with it is that you knew Austin was going to win that Rumble before it started. I mean some people might have thought Mark Henry or Owen Hart would come out on top, but those people would have just been completely idiotic, I mean, out and out morons.
But I know you've got this one higher, so what do you have to say about it?
Finn:
Yeah that was my #2 ranked Rumble. All the things you mentioned, plus as you noted about Austin in a pick earlier, this was a match where the Rock quite possibly made the leap to being a main eventer. But there’s a list of some great little things in this Rumble that really push it towards the top for me, and this is… is that list:
- “WHAT IS UP WITH D-LO?!?” - Kurgan fan - Austin on Goldust clothesline - And the mess that is Ahmed Johnson.
Ahmed stumbles to ring half drunk and half asleep. He gets a giant wedgie mid way through his appearance that he never fixes. Then he just gets dumped out and tires to kick a guy when he’s leaving only he falls down like a pathetic lump of shit. Then! The icing on the cake! As he’s leaving to the back, just before he makes it behind the curtain, Kama enters the Rumble and violently shoves Ahmed out of the way. Ahmed’s response? Nothing. He gives a half-assed attempt at going after for him for about, oh, a second. Then he leaves. Probably passed out backstage while Dink dropped a Cleveland steamer on his chest.
Anyway, that’s #4 and this is #3…
1992
Winner: Ric Flair Final Four: Ric Flair, Sid Justice, Hulk Hogan, Macho Man 1 & 2: Bulldog and Dibiase 30: Warlord
It was for the title!!! Flair goes almost the distance coming in at 3. There’s the classic Bossman elimination, and an epic final group of Hall of Famers: those guys above, and Slaughter and Piper (also IRS and Martel). Not to mention Piper finally making IRS pay for wearing that tie.
But what makes this Rumble for me was Bobby Heenan’s commentary. He was great throughout the Rumble, but two of my favorite lines were the “DAMNIT” when he saw Flair had entered at #3, and when Flair was left alone in the ring mid-Rumble and Heenan went nuts like he had won: “Flair’s done it! He’s won!!!”
Anyway, I’m sure this one is on your list at some point, so… care to comment?
Erik:
Yes, I had 1992 in my number 1 slot. Obviously the fact that it was for the title makes it the most important Rumble ever. Everything you mentioned was basically what I had to say. One thing I wanted to add was that I seem to remember Flair actually taking the fight to people repeatedly in that match. That's pretty unheard of for the type of heel he was, so that's cool.
Also, I think you short-changed the Bossman elimination. This was more than classic, it defined a generation of botched Rumble spots. For every other bad elimination you can say, "Well, at least it wasn't as bad as Bossman's." Not to mention the flurry of action that led-up to it, including the Bossman's roundhouse whiff kick while his shirt gave new meaning to the term unbuttoned. Looking back, I'm pretty sure I knew wrestling was choreographed by 1992. I was 6 years old and I think you guys had let me in on the secret. But I'm sure somewhere in the back of my mind, I still thought it might be real. Well, if I did, this elimination sealed the deal for me. I realized right then and there, as Bossman leaped into the ropes fell back towards the ring and jumped back over and out, that wrestling was fake.
Anyway, as for my #3 we've already discussed it, it was 1997.
And my #2 is what I'm sure you're #1 is (confused yet everyone?) so I'll give you the honors of getting the first crack at it.
Finn:
Alrighty! That leaves us with just one missing Rumble, my # 1 and your # 2…
1999.
Just kidding. That Rumble is the worst ever. Shouldn’t even have been mentioned in our rundown… but before we unveil the last one I thought we could drop some notes on the remaining Rumbles. Any other fond memories?
Like, 1988, the first one ever… and a jobber named Hacksaw won! Or how about, the worst Rumble elimination of all time (not to mention it was for the win) when Yokozuna threw Randy Savage out FROM THE MAT after Randy tried to pin him. Or there’s one of the greatest Rumble lines of all time in 1996 when Vince asks Mr. Perfect who he thinks is coming in at # 2: “Uhhhh… (Henry Godwin’s music hits)… HOGMAN!”. Classic. The stuff graduation tributes are made of.
Don’t really have any comments on the later ones that weren’t already mentioned. Probably why they didn’t make the list. But I felt those few above at least needed SOME recognition.
Anyway got any other final comments that don’t involve our last Rumble? Or should I just go on?
Erik:
I think at some point we have to mention Rick Martel, a truly great Rumble performer who would always stick around for a solid amount of time.
A couple of other notes:
1996: Shawn Michaels wins, then moons the crowd, pulling his pants so far down in the front that it revealed his pubes.
1991: A kid in the crowd correctly predicts the next entrant when he shouts: "It's Hulk Hogan!"
Not Sure which Rumble: A spot is supposed to remain empty, but you can see that one of the L.O.D. is about to come through the curtain. As if he was thinking, "Well, looks like someone fucked up, guess I gotta save the Rumble." Then Bruce Pritchard or someone pulls him back.
And lastly, the recurring quotes from every one of the first 10 or so Rumbles:
-When tag teamers would inevitably fight: "It's every man for himself in the Royal Rumble." -After #30 would come out: "The numbers game is over." -The aforementioned: "Well the NCAA's got their Final 4, and we've got ours." -Any of us watching an undercard match where a guy gets thrown over the top rope: "Ya know, if this were the Rumble, he'd be outta here." -And finally, when the countdown is going for #30 and the announcers say something like: "Only one man left now, and I think we both know who it is ...." #30 finally comes out before the announcer can say anything, proving that they had no idea who was left. "Yes, it's the Warlord. Only one person it could have been, and it's the Warlord."
Finn:
YES! Classics!!! I love Animal's inner monologue. "Better fix this. FAST!" BTW (it's short for the By the way... little blogger (blogger not booger, Hugh) lingo I've picked up along the way), Animal was coming in because Macho no showed. First time that ever happened.
(Sorry everyone! Couldn't find quick clips for 1998, and there was no good Flair winning clip... plus I had to hustle in preparation for Lost)
(Coolest pic I could find of Michaels... I was pretty close to putting one of his Playgirl photos on here, but ultimately decided that was a little too... well, gay I guess)
Finn:
Ok... that brings us to your #2 (and rightful #1) and my #1...
1995
Winner: Shawn Michaels Final 4: Michaels, Bulldog, Crush and Luger 1&2: Shawn Michaels and British Bulldog 30: Crush
This was highlighted by a couple of indivdual spots like the quick elimination of Luke, and the even quicker elimination of Moe, which was dubbed a record (later corrected by WWE.com. The Warlord was dumped quicker). Pam Anderson ringside. The most fast and furious Rumble ever (60 second intervals)... actually could have been longer. Shawn Michaels is body pressed like a dozen times in the match, on the verge of elimination over 75% of the Rumble, culminating in one of the most memorable Rumble moments of all time. There also the Adam Bomb entrance where he is WAY to amped. He looks like a fool. And of course... the Billy Gunn slide.
But the real story of this Rumble is the #1 and 2 entrants going the distance and being the last two men in the Rumble. Michaels obviously is the highlight, but Davey Boy deserves a lot of credit here too. After Bulldog clothelines Crush out over the ropes and the crowd almost instantly realizes that we're left with the same two men who started the Rumble... the place goes ballistic! The camera is shaking like crazy!! The Sinclairs and Andersen or going ape shit!!! Just a great, great Rumble. Probably one of the greatest pro-wrestling moments of all time.
Michaels ultimately gets Bulldog... sort of cheaply... but hey, Bulldog should have been sure he was out before celebrating.
HBK went on to bigger and better things. He was basically a mid-carder until this point, so it was great to think that anyone could win the Rumble. Well... almost anyone.
So that's that. Let's hear your top ten list in order again, and any final thoughts?
Erik:
Everything you mentioned was good. I agree with it all. A couple of things I can't believe you forgot though:
-Mabel tickling King Kong Bundy to eliminate him. -Bob Holly apparently being told by someone that if Michaels accidentally got tossed, then he was in line for the win. This led to Holly frantically trying to eliminate Michaels on about 5 different occasions, and getting dangerously close every time.
The reasons I did not put this # 1 are because of the time and the roster. The whole 1 minute interval thing makes it feel a little cheap to me. As for the roster, have you ever looked at it? This has to be the worst collection of Rumble talent ever. After the first 2 here are the best entrants in terms of notoriety:
11. Owen Hart (barely makes it to the ring after being attacked by Hitman, then gets eliminated instantly when he finally does get down there) 15. King Kong Bundy (Gets tickled out of the match) 19. Lex Luger (Uggh) 25. Bob Backlund (Same thing as Owen) 30. Crush (I guess)
As you can see, the talent was lacking. And I think anyone who's still reading this post would agree with me on that.
Anyway, here's my final top ten: 10. 1989 9. 2002 8. 2008 7. 1990 6. 2001 5. 2004 4. 1998 3. 1997 2. 1995 1. 1992
Finn:
Yeah, you're right, it's nothing but Jobbers. The only one's even close were Luger, Owen, and Backlund. I wont even count Bundy or Crush.
And I gave a reversed point scale to come up with combined list (10pts. for #1 finsih, 1 pt for #10, etc.
And here is the final result:
10. 2001 (5pts) 9. 2007 (6pts) 8. 2000 (7pts, but only on one ballot) 6t. 2008 (7pts) 6t. 2002 (7pts) 5. 2004 (8pts) 4. 1997 (11pts) 3. 1998 (16pts) 2. 1992 (18pts) 1. 1995 (19pts)
So there it is Mustacheers! The official list of the greatest Royal Rumble's of all time!
Thanks Erik, this was fun... although I wonder how many people will lose what little respect they had for us after even seeing this post's lenght. And no one will read this. For the record.
Have you ever wondered, "If that baseball team were a wrestler who would they be?" Well, I did. In fact, my curiosity went so far that it manifested itself as this post. Below is every team in the majors along with the wrestler that they would be. Are they all good comparisons? No. Are most them good? Questionable. Did I think of 5 good ones and then stretch it to encompass the whole league? Yes. But, it should be enjoyable nonetheless. So, without further ado, here's the answer or answers to the age old question.
NL East
Mets – Macho Man -Won their first title in a miraculous effort, ’69 Mets, Wrestlemania IV Macho. Later won another title and are a somewhat marquee name in the sport. However, they have been marred by drug use and ridiculous debacles, for the Mets it’s been their last two Septembers and for Macho a rap album.
Phillies – Chris Benoit -Took them a long time to get over the hump and had a reputation for not being able to win the title. But finally they broke through, and everyone lived happily ever after. That’s it, that’s how it ended.
Marlins – “Million Dollar Man” Ted DiBiase -Only care about the bottom line, and they’re not above buying a championship. They’re also not afraid to sell everything it took to win that title as long as it’ll turn a profit. Both have man-servants named Virgil.
Braves – Mr. Perfect -Always technically sound and executed very well. Despite being good enough to win a title for a long period of time, they never did get there. Oh, the Braves won a World Series in ’95? I thought they called the season after Edgar’s double … no?
Nationals – The Repo Man -His angle was that he literally was a repo man, someone who would come and take your stuff when you couldn't pay for it any longer, which is more or less what Washington D.C. did to Montreal. Also, both were better known under different names. And they both suck … hard.
NL Central
Cubs – Mick Foley -Lovable losers. Fan favorites that always seemed to come out on the losing end in the biggest situations. And for some reason it seems like they enjoy putting people over.
Cardinals – Bret Hart -Consistently run organization that you just have to respect. They’ve won many titles in the past. Never the flashiest, but they always get the job done.
Reds – Kane -The Reds dynasty of the 70s was called … the Big Red Machine. That’s good enough for me! Oh wait a minute, I forgot about the Nasty Boyz! I wanna go back1 I have to go back!
Pirates – Jake “The Snake” Roberts -Had some good times in the late 80s/early 90s but now they’ve devolved into a shell of their former selves. Everybody agrees at this point that they’re pretty much bat-shit crazy. Not to mention the way they always push away the ones they love.
Brewers – “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan -Longtime mediocre team deserves a longtime mediocre wrestler. Also, I feel like Hacksaw could fit in pretty well while tailgating outside a Brewers game.
Astros – Rowdy Roddy Piper -Just when you think you’ve got all the answers, the Houston Astros change the question. I mean, c’mon, they introduced the concept of playing on carpet and they put a hill in centerfield. Neither one has won a title, and I’m not sure either ever deserved to. Yep, I said it.
NL West
Diamondbacks – Brock Lesnar -Won the title immediately after entering the league. Then grew tired of the sport and left for other things …what’s that? The Diamondbacks still play baseball?
Dodgers – Shawn Michaels -Perennial contenders with a flare for the dramatic. For the Dodgers it was Jackie stealing home or Gibson’s one-legged homer, for Michaels it’s been countless Wrestlemania moments.
Rockies – Triple H -Much in the same way that the thin air of Colorado inflated many of the Rockies’ statistics, the WWF’s ridiculous amount of title-swapping in recent years has lead to Triple H having a stupid amount of titles.
Padres – Yokozuna -The Padres have made it to the World Series twice, losing in 5 games in ’84 and getting swept in ’98. Yokozuna had similarly poor performances in the two Wrestlemanias he main-evented (IX & X). On the other hand you really can't blame either of them for it; the Padres came up against two great teams, and Yokozuna was 600 lbs. Also, for a long time the Padres had the saves leader in Trevor Hoffman, while Yokozuna had Mr. Fuji who saved many a match for him with a handful of salt to the opponent’s eyes.
Giants – Hulk Hogan Maybe a little too good for the Giants, but let’s look at the facts. Both had a lot of titles early in their career. Both made a stunning heel turn: Hogan to the nWo, the Giants leaving New York. Both came agonizingly close to greatness in 2002: Hogan nearly beating The Rock at Wrestlemania X-8, the Giants blowing a 5-0 lead in game 6 of the World Series. Throw in the Barry Bonds corollaries: steroid use and a lame reality show, and there’s really no getting around it.
AL East
Yankees – Ric Flair -The dirtiest players in the game, willing to do whatever it takes to win. They’re all about the luxurious lifestyle. You hate them, but you have to respect them. They have more titles than anybody else.
Blue Jays – Ultimate Warrior -Both are from parts unknown. Won the title then disappeared for the most part.
Red Sox – The Rock -Rode a wave of popularity to their title win, then immediately turned heel. From there on out they received extremely polarized reactions, either you love them or you hate them. (Applies more to the Red Sox current situation than their whole history)
Rays – Barry Horowitz -Pathetic losers who actually get a push for once in their existence, then everybody laughs about it afterwards.
Orioles – Sid Justice -Both are better suited to play softball.
AL Central
White Sox – Ravishing Rick Rude -Much in the same way that 8 White Sox were banned from baseball in 1919, Rick Rude was banned from the WWF in 1991 for making insensitive comments about Big Bossman’s mother. Both are also known for their creative, borderline ridiculous outfits.
Royals – Dusty Rhodes -I always hear they were really good back in the 70s. Could’ve fooled me, every time I watch them they’re boring as hell.
Tigers – Goldberg -Rode a record-setting hot start (’84 Tigers: 20-4, Goldberg 200-0, or whatever it was) to a title. After that they were never as good and they both carelessly ended legends’ careers Goldberg by kicking Bret Hart in the head and the Tigers by forcing Billy Chapel into retirement. And look, they're making the same face.
Twins – “Superfly” Jimmy Snuka -The Twins have a unique home-field advantage, and thus they play a different brand of baseball. Of course, Superfly had a different brand of wrestling that he utilized to his advantage. Both have an iconic leaping moment – Snuka’s big splash from the top of the cage, and Kirby’s catch against the glass in the ’91 World Series.
Indians – Randy “The Ram” Robinson -Since the best thing about the Indians is the movie that was based on them, I chose a movie wrestler to represent them. Much like the Ram, the Indians’ best days are long behind them.
AL West
A's – Superstar Billy Graham -Known for being very flashy (70s A’s) and taking lots of steroids (late 80s A’s)
Angels – Goldust -These guys are all fags. And every time they win it feels like I get kicked in the balls.
Rangers – Eddy Guerrero -Eddy was all about cheating to win, well, no organization has had as many prominent cheaters as Texas over the past two decades. Sosa, Raffy Palmeiro, Ivan Rodriguez, Canseco, Juan Gonzalez, they were all Rangers. Unfortunately, the whole winning part hasn’t worked out as well for Texas.
Mariners – Ricky Steamboat -First, there’s the Asian connection. The M's have an Asian owner, their "best" player is Asian, and they have a strong Asian fanbase; Steamboat is Asian. Neither has won the world title, but at one point they were considered the most talented in the sport. For Steamboat it was the mid to late 80s, and for the M’s it was the mid to late 90s. Steamboat’s Wrestlemania III performance can compare to the '95 team, which means his lame return in the early 90s was the last couple seasons for the Mariners.
So there you have it. The definitive list. Actually, I'm willing to bet it's the only list.
