10.30.2009

NFL Picks Week 8

Well I honestly hadn't planned on doing another one of these posts, but after nailing the IND-STL game on the nose (42-6) I feel I owe it to myself and the shitload of readers to keep this thing going at least one more week. Not to mention that I went 10-3 in terms of straight up winners and losers which is better than most of the "experts" at ESPN and Fox Sports. Need another reason? My pick NE 34, TB 9; actual score NE 35, TB 7. Look if you haven't figured it out yet, I'm doing picks again this week because damn it, I earned it!

Early Games:


Houston @ Buffalo

The past few weeks Houston has proved that they're not awful, while Buffalo has had two excruciating wins and proven that they may, in fact, still be awful.

Texans 23-14


Cleveland @ Chicago

Both of these teams were humiliated in blowout losses last week. For the Bears this will probably light a fire under them and they'll be hungry for redemption; for the Browns, it'll just be business as usual.

Bears 28-9


Seattle @ Dallas

On paper this looks like a recipe for disaster. DeMarcus Ware going against a 4th string (might even count as 5th now) left tackle. But games aren't played on paper, they're played on the field, and sometimes at 10am PT, which is the case this week, and we all know how the Hawks do in those games .... fannnnnnnntastic.

Hawks 21-20 (wink)


St. Louis @ Detroit

I smell a Stinger.

Lions 24-14


Denver @ Baltimore

Alright Denver, you've already ruined what I thought was going to be a great draft pick. The least you could do at this point is lose out and get us something in the 8-12 range.

Ravens 20-17


San Francisco @ Indianapolis

Well it only took 3 years for that Alex Smith to Vernon Davis connection to come alive, and it will take about 4 and a half minutes for it to die.

Colts 31-13


Miami @ New York Jets

Anybody heard of this wildcat thing? It's supposed to be wild.

Dolphins 28-25


New York Giants @ Philadelphia

I heard they're combining the score from this game with the score from the World Series game later in the night. And whichever city has more ... well nothing will change, why would one game affect the other? That would be stupid. You're an idiot.

Giants 21-16


Afternoon Games


Jacksonville @ Tennessee

Oh baby, Vince Young is back as a starter. This could end up being both bad and good. It'll be bad for VY when he throws 4 interceptions, but it'll be good for all of us who have always wanted to see a real-life version of "The Last Boy Scout" opening scene.

Jaguars 17-14


Oakland @ San Diego

When I was in school this is the type of game that would come on at 1pm on CBS and I'd decide, "Well I guess it's time to do some homework."

Chargers 35-10


Carolina @ Arizona

This year the Cardinals have been much better on the road, but that's probably just because they haven't played the Panthers at home yet.

Cardinals 27-14


Minnesota @ Green Bay

Could somebody get away with assassinating Brett Favre during this game? I say yes. And I'll be banking on that Sunday as I load my gun outside of Lambeau.

Packers 23-20


Sunday Night

Phillies 5-2


Monday Night

Atlanta @ New Orleans

Saints players are starting to talk about going undefeated, which means they'll surely lose. But wait, Atlanta sucks against decent teams on the road.

Saints 34-27

10.28.2009

Game One

Game One, or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Learned to Love the Yankees.

Just kidding. So Mickey Mantle's was a little too crowded to get a table or a seat at the bar. I caught the start of the game there. The best part was the crotchety old man in the corner who was telling people to stop talking during the National Anthem. He seemed very upset.

I'll begin my coverage at the 7th Inning Stretch.

Both pitchers have been pretty dominant with the exception of two pitches. Indians fans are probably really enjoying themselves right now.


I might miss a few of the at bats because I have to flip back and forth between the game and South Park. I won't spoil anything but there's a great Cartman Rockband performance. And apparently the South Park guys are not big fans of many of the current reality shows out right now.

10:25 - Top of the 8th

Phil Hughes is on in relief. Maybe Rollins should try and bunt his way on again. He should've been thrown out of the game for trying to start the World Series with a bunt. Whoa, must've seen what I was writing as he just crushed one foul.


Hughes needs to get his shit together. Guess he won't get a chance. Nice outing by the youngster. And those quality New York fans are giving him a great sendoff. He'll be worthless the rest of the series. He's not mentally ready for the World Series.

These DirecTV commercials are getting more and more random. They seriously decided on Wayne's World 2? Next up is Delgo, but they can't come to a financial agreement with Freddie Prinze.

2-2 count to Utley. If he homers here he has to be the early favorite for series MVP.

He struck out looking. What a loser. This guy sucks.

Third pitcher of the inning. Baseball is just kinda cool sometimes.


Rauuuuuuuuuuul! Have to be happy for Ibanez and the year he's had. Yankees probably should've left CC in there. Hindsight is 20/20.


I know I was joking about Utley needing to do more to be the favorite for MVP, but I'm not sure I would give it to him over Cliff Lee at this point. It's pretty ridiculuous how he's completely shut down this lineup. It'd be an impressive game against any team at any point during the season. But this is a pretty loaded lineup in game one of the World Series in New York. I mean it's not on a Jack-Morris-Game-7 level, but it's pretty impressive.


Top of the 9th
I hope they get out of this soon. I feel like if it gets more out of hand then they won't send Lee back out there. I'd like to see him go the distance.


Bottom of the 9th
Alright! Lee is out to finish it up.
Jeter gets a little blooper. They better not take Lee out.
Crap. Damon just lined a single. Lee might've had to wait too long during the the top of the inning.


Way to go Rollins. What a terrible way to lose the shutout. What an idiot.


The end of this game is pissing me off. I wanted to be in bed 30 minutes ago, but it's just dragging on and on.


3 Ks for A-Rod. Ouch.


Nice way to end it for Lee. 10Ks. It would've looked much better with the shutout, but still a great performance.


So on a side note, one cool thing about NYC is that there are a lot of bars that cater to different teams' fan groups. For instance, I inadvertently went to a Michigan bar this weekend. I saw several other bars flying NFL team flags outside their bar. Then, the other day, I actually passed by a popular St. Louis Rams bar and thought you would all like to see it.





Chase Utley

Here's some video of Chase Utley the last time (no clue if that's true or not) he was in New York a few years back for the All Star game... the New Yawkers weren't real welcoming...





Anyone watching the game tonight? Guess Utley holds a grudge.

A Moment of Silence

Walt Jones' career might be over. Let's all take a moment out of our day to appreciate his outstanding play over the years. And in the words of Vince McMahon, "If this really is the end, I would like to say thank you for the memories." (2nd time that's been quoted this week. Also funny to think about the fact that he said this to Hogan in 1992. Maybe that means Walt isn't done quite yet.)

Back in Black

Yo! I'm back in New York and I'm back on the blog, and the Yankees are back in the World Series. The hosts of this site reached out to me as a natural choice as World Series correspondant. The Yankees played in the World Series 3 out of my 4 years spent in New York and haven't been back in 6 years. Now, all of the sudden, I come back to the Empire State and the Yankees are back in the World Series. You're welcome ya stinkin gavones.

My prediction for this series: Yankees in 6. A-Rod is MVP. Just a perfect scenario that we'd all love to see play out. My real hope for this series is that they show Kate Hudson a bunch and then she takes a liner right to the face. When she finally gets up she'll look like Goldie Hawn.

Anyhow, I'll be heading over to Mickey Mantle's to watch the game with my favorite people in the world: drunk Yankees fans.

I knew I should've packed my Yankees Suck shirt.

Draft Guru Pete... World Series Correspondent

As some of you know Draft Guru Pete has already made the move to NYC to be closer to the PHYSICAL draft. That's dedication homes! We thought since he'll be in the heart of the action, we'd make im our Official World Series Correspondent. I'm late in getting him his posting rights, but hopefully he'll have something up here soon. Stay tuned.

10.27.2009

#15

A gang banger with speed. A 'roided out date rape sess. A 35 year old recovering alcoholic Heisman candidate. An illiterate natural athlete. A "mailing it in" Jimmy Caan. A lamest looking Halle Berry ever, other than Monsters Ball... well until... you know.... Poo butt mother fuckers.

That all might sound like a recipe for disaster. But really... it's a recipe for the 15th spot on our movie countdown:



#15: The Program

One of my favorites. Some of the greatest shit talking lines in the history of cinema. (other great lines too) I don't want to steal all the thunder (and there's a lot of it) on this post, so I'll let you guys take it from here.

What are some of your favorite lines out of this gem?

I'll get it started:

"Oh I'm gonna lead... question is can you boys follow?" Joe Kane, grizzled QB1

PS: If none of you douches come up with any, I'll just do them alone. And by myself.


10.26.2009

#16

Back by popular demand baby!!!!!

The greatest sports movies of all time!

Just when you thought it was gone, like a wicked case of vd, it's back.

And we're back with a doozy...



#16 Eight Men Out



I love this movie. I own this movie. I ranked this movie much, much higher on the list. So some losers voting ruined it. I won't name names.

Anyway...

This movie has an allstar cast (Sweeney, Sheen, Cusack, Doc Brown, Straitham, pretty sure John Locke's dad, and... wait for it... Micheal Rooooooker).

Really well done. I thought it really captured the time frame, and just really sucked me in when I was kid.

I felt terrible for Buck and Shoeless Joe. A real impact for a roughly ten year old me.

Also... loved the sort of... mystery ending. Just awesome stuff.




Anyway, judging by the rest of the votes, it didn't impact others as much as me... but what say you Mustacheers? Anyone else dig this flick?

Anyone else still reading this site?

10.23.2009

NFL Picks Week 7

And now, my weekly post of predictions for the NFL scores this Sunday.

The Early Games:


Green Bay @ Cleveland:

Tony, my friend and co-worker at the NFL Mix is a Browns fan. Why? I don't know. He needed a team when he started working there a few years ago so he chose them, there was no real reason for this choice. While I commend him for his brave venture it just goes to show that there's really no reason for anyone to be a Browns fan.

Packers: 27-10


San Diego @ Kansas City:

The Chargers have seemed to feel like they're entitled to something ever since they went 14-2 in '06, which might explain why they've gotten off to a slow start the last few years. On the bright side, at least only one of them choked Tila Tequila. (By the way, NEVER try to make her a victim.) They'll pull it together enough to beat KC though.

Chargers: 23-20


Indianapolis @ St. Louis:

Has anybody else noticed the Rams are really shitty?

Colts: 42-6


Minnesota @ Pittsburgh:

Two QBs who just love havin' fun. Pick-up football with the boys, ridin' motorcycles, showboatin' without reproach, gettin' sacked, painkillers, rapin'.

Steelers: 24-16 (The fans will be the real winners.)


New England @ Tampa Bay (In London):

If you went to a soccer match and one of them was nicknamed the Vietcong would you boo them?

Patriots: 34-9


San Francisco @ Houston:

The Texans might be turning things around after a road win against the Bengals last week. And even if they aren't they're playing the Niners this week, so a win is in the cards.

Texans 28-20


Afternoon Games:

Buffalo @ Carolina:

Oh God who cares! They couldn't pay me to watch this game. Actually, I take that back, they'll pay me and I'll watch.

Panthers: 17-16


New York Jets @ Oakland:

Games played in Oakland always just look and feel so unimportant. I don't blame the Eagles for losing last week. They were probably thinking, "Wait, that was the actual game we just played? I thought we were doing a scrimmage at a high school or something. There was painted dirt on the field for Christ's sake!" In that same vain, this game won't be in the NFL Mix because it isn't a sell out. We call these games Stingers because that guy never sold out!

Jets: 13-6


Atlanta @ Dallas:

Here's hoping DeMarcus Ware gets injured.

Falcons: 27-24


Chicago @ Cincinnati:

The Bengals D is going to try to wipe that stupid look off Jay Cutler's face. They'll give up around the start of the 4th when they realize that's just what he looks like.

Bengals: 20-16


New Orleans @ Miami:

A lot of people like the 'Phins to upset the Saints in this one. And while they might upset them with their annoying offense, Miami won't actually win.

Saints: 28-23


Sunday Night

Arizona @ New York Giants:

The teacher comes back to face the student. Warner vs. Eli. By the time this one gets underway America will have been waiting a long time for it ... about 45 minutes since the end of the 1 o'clock games.

Giants: 27-17


Monday Night

Philadelphia @ Washington:

Just like every week Monday features the best match-up. My trademark "Wacky Pick of the Week" is that Jim Zorn will be executed with 1:34 remaining in the 2nd quarter by a sniper who was hired by Daniel Snyder. Zorn's replacement? Tom Cruise who, ironically, will be doing research for his role in the upcoming Jim Zorn bio-pic.

Eagles: 30-14


There they are. And as always, if I nail one exactly I take myself out for a Blizzard.


One of the More Confusing Things I've Ever Seen


Alright, enough is enough, somebody has to bring this up. What in the world is going on with that Tyler Hansbrough AT&T commercial? I'm dumbfounded every time I see it. Here's the link to the video.


The questions I have:


-Are we supposed to know it's Tyler Hansbrough? Sure he was a famous college basketball player but do you honestly think the majority of America knows who he is when they watch the commercial? They're probably not even aware he's famous, they just think he's an unfortunate looking actor in the same vain as this guy. (Also pictured here)


-Why did AT&T decide to use Tyler Hansbrough for a phone commercial? Was there a list of athletes they wanted to use and eventually they settled on Hansbrough? If so, how big was the list? How far down do you have to go before you say, "Well I guess Hansbrough's our guy." Or was he the choice from the beginning? Were they in the pitch meeting saying, "Tyler Hansbrough helps a little girl find her dog."


-Why is he still wearing UNC gear? The guy has graduated and is now a member of the Indiana Pacers (apparently), obviously he's having some trouble letting go.

Despite all of these questions this is far and away my favorite commercial on television, I watch it every time it's on without fail. So whatever their reasoning, it worked.

10.21.2009

I hope she was worth it Steve

Word out of Bristol is that Steve Phillips took a page out of Harold Reynolds' book. Suspended for an affair with a production assistant. You think she's lying! How else would she know about that big birthmark on his crotch just above his penis? Putting your reputation on the line like that, being married with several children and all, you know she is freekin hot.





10.15.2009

WHORE


I have managed to put up with this man as much as I can. We all know the end is near for Neihaus but the M's can do better. As much as I enjoy his clever "Case Closed, DA" and "put this one in your sealog mariners", or whatever the hell it is.

I was able to let it slide when I tuned into Sunday Night Football last year and heard him calling the game on Westwood One. I thought maybe he already had that gig. But what I cant forgive is turning on the highly anticipated Florida Tuskers vs Las Vegas Locomotives and hearing Sims on the mike. That's right, you are looking at the play-by-play voice of the UFL. Well UFL, you can have him! They obviously didnt check his wikipedia page before hiring him:

"Listeners often criticize Sims for yelling on mundane plays, as if to generate a false sense of excitement in the listener. An excellent example of this tendency was Sims' radio work on the January 11, 2009 NFC playoff game between the New York Giants and Philadelphia Eagles, during which Sims frequently raised his voice's pitch and volume on incomplete passes during non-crucial phases of the game, plays that few educated football observers would find significant or meaningful."

Lets not confuse this with when Calabro started doing ESPN games. He did that because ESPN wanted someone awesome. Sims sucks. Am I the only one who doesnt want the guy calling my teams games to be doing it because it's "one of his gigs"?

10.06.2009

Gameday will never be in Pullman...

but as we know the Cougs are always at Gameday. Now everyone will know. Herbstreit is the man!