12.31.2009

Cougs get screwed

Anyone lucky enough to get OSN (Oregon University's network, i dunno... it's top notch stuff by the way, I'm excited to watch their Rose Bowl Recap live from Padadena) just saw the Cougs get royally screwed.



We... yeah WE, I went to school there. WE just got absolutely dicked over by some inept referees on a judgement call. Casto won the game with a lay in. .3 seconds left. I celebrate much like the Cougs. Only the refs call a technical foul for a kid who jumped a little too high off the bench and onto the court. Imagine my surprise when I saw Tajuan "I don't miss threes and have 19 years of eligibility" Porter calmly step to the line and tie the game with free throws. (See I turned the volume off because I was tired of listening to the two homer shit heads who were trying to call the game).

We end up losing in Double OT.

It was the worst officiating move I'd seen since the Superbowl.

I'm still shaking with rage. Actually hard to type. And this is about 30 minutes after the event. I don't think I should watch sports anymore.

Be forewarned. If you attempt to talk "smack" on this thread about this situation, be prepared to fight me the next time you see me.

12.28.2009

#2



It's in the hole!!!!



#2 Caddyshack



I could go on and on about how great this movie and Lacey Underall's tits were... but I'll just say this:

"If I kill all the golfers on this course they're gonna lock me up and throw away the key"

Favorite parts go!

SLAM! Energy Drink.

I just saw a commercial for yet another energy drink, it was called Slam! What makes this drink stand out is that it's spokesman is .....


Josh Brown!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

I don't know what's more pathetic, that Joshy-poo is repping some 3rd-rate energy drink, or the fact that a company thought it would be a good idea to make the kicker on the worst team in the NFL their spokesman.

Here's a link to their website, it looks pretty classy. By the way, I forgot to mention that the other "athletes" that appear on their commercial are Matt Harpring, an aged golfer I've never heard of, and what appears to be a softball player (whether or not she's supposed to be famous was unclear to me).

Anyway, good work Josh. I guess this proves that you made the right call by signing with the Rams.

12.26.2009

NFL Picks Week 16

Sorry diehards, I know I'm posting these picks a little later than usual, but I just flew in from Seattle. Oh what, you're expecting me to say, "And boy are my arms tired?" Stop making cheap jokes, alright pal? There's no place for them here, I'm strictly high-brow, I'm like the Dennis Miller of the internet. Ok, I just checked, and it turns out Dennis Miller has a website, so I guess he's the Dennis Miller of the internet. But I'm close enough right? Or was that joke itself too high-brow for you?


Morning Games


Buffalo @ Atlanta

I really want to watch this game. Then again, I also saw Delgo in theatres, so ...

Falcons 24-13


Kansas City @ Cincinnati

At this point does anybody expect the Bengals to actually win a game in the playoffs? I'll tell ya what, I do! So that was a stupid question.

Bengals 28-10


Oakland @ Cleveland

I'd say that this is going to be a crappy game, but Cleveland has made a habit of putting on great shows against other shitty teams, and Oakland has recently won two road games in the final minute. So, chances are this one gets crrrrrrraaaaazzy! Or ends up real poopy (I'd already used crappy and shitty).

Browns 35-34


Seattle @ Green Bay

So the Hawks have hit rock bottom right? Please? Please tell me it can't get worse than that. Some good news, Green Bay also lost to Tampa this year, so, I guess we have a shot right?

Seahawks 24-23


Baltimore @ Pittsburgh

I'm pretty sure these teams have played 9 times in the last 2 seasons. I'm not sure if it's a scheduling anomaly or what, but I just checked, and sure enough ... 9 times. Well ya know what they say: "Fool me 8 times shame on the Ravens."

Steelers 23-20


Houston @ Miami

Whoever loses this one is out of playoff contention. And to be honest, whoever wins is probably still out of playoff conetention, but don't tell them that. Seriously, they have no idea how the playoffs work.

Dolphins 27-20


Jacksonville @ New England

I'm now convinced that the Patriots really aren't good. But if you've been paying attention to my picks for the last month or so (just kidding, I know you have) I definitely don't think the Jags are good. So, I guess the Patriots are the not good team I'm going with here.

Patriots 26-17


Tampa Bay @ New Orleans

Can anybody truly know what to expect from the explosive Josh Freeman and the Bucs lockdown D? I mean, all bets are off right? Even still, I think I'll pick the Saints because they still need to clinch the 1 seed.

Saints 31-14


Carolina @ New York Giants

So Delhomme sits and the Panthers win, coincidence? Well that depends, I mean if you want to get into a meta-physical debate about whether or not life is just a series of random events, or if we indeed all have our own destinies than that's fine. But in this case, no, it was no coincidence, Delhomme sucks.

Giants 28-18



Afternoon Games


Detroit @ San Francisco

Who's ready for an inspired performance from the Lions? Me! Who's not? Bateman. Sorry Bobby.

Lions 19-17


St. Louis @ Arizona

The Rams are now in sole possession of the worst record in the league, and if I know them like I think I do, they're not gonna let that slip away. In fact, why don't they quit beating around the bush and just rest their starters? They could be like a team that already clinched a playoff spot, except exactly the opposite.

Cardinals 35-13


New York Jets @ Indianapolis

Word on the street is that Rex Ryan will send relentless blitzes at Peyton Manning, forcing Jim Caldwell to sit his QB for fear of injury. Well how about this? If you just blitz Manning every down, he'll probably burn you downfield repeatedly. Even if he only plays for the first half Manning may have built up enough of a lead for the Colts to hold on for the win.

Colts 24-17


Denver @ Philadelphia

Denver's fighting for their playoff lives. However, what the rest of us don't know is that someone planted a bomb inside Donovan McNabb that will go off if he doesn't win 11 games in the regular saeson, so he's playing for his actual life.

Eagles 30-20



Sunday Night


Dallas @ Washington

Huh, the NFC East on primetime ... whaddaya know? I'm not sure if any of you watched the Redskins game on Monday night, but after the fake field goal that ended the first half (which was maybe the worst play I've ever seen) the D.C. fans sent their team off the field with perhaps the loudest hometown boos I've ever heard. Just thought I'd mention that.

Cowboys 27-12

Monday Night


Minnesota @ Chicago

No more day games for the Vikings huh? Alright. Cool, I can't get enough of this Favre guy.

Vikings 24-20




12.23.2009

Brandon Morrow Trade

The boys at USSM, more specifically Dave Cameron, have come up with 3 logical scenarios for the Brandon Morrow trade.

http://ussmariner.com/2009/12/23/choose-your-own-conclusion/

I'd like to submit a 4th option...



Jack Z was getting too good at his job! Every other GM was going to be scared of him if he didn't throw a few stinkers out there. Now when he's got another sucker GM hooked in and they say
"Wait a second Jacky Boy!!!! You never make dumb moves... that means your fleecing me pal! NO DEAL!!!", Jack can fire back with "No sir, remember that Morrow trade? All I got for a former 1st round pick was a relief pitcher and a crummy prospect! I can't win em all!"

Done deal.

In Jack we trust.

Happy Hanukkah (sp?) everyone!


12.21.2009

#3

#3 Field of Dreams



I you don't like this movie you're either a douche bag or some kind of nazi.




I'm in a hurry. I know what a travesty. But let's get serious for a moment.

Here's James Earl Jones'ss''s'sss' s speech.:



I didn't add the video... because I really wanted his powerful words to hit home. That... and for some reason there's no video on youtube for fod.

PEACE OUT YO!

12.19.2009

NFL Picks Week 15

I totally nailed that Chargers-Cowboys pick last week.


Saturday Night


Dallas @ New Orleans

So Dallas can't win in December, we all know that, but there's something else going against them this week too: New Orleans hasn't lost in any month this season. Even October? Yes ... even October. With these two factors nothing has to give.

Saints 34-20


Morning Games


New England @ Buffalo

Were the Panthers supposed to be breaking news to us by saying that Randy Moss gives up on plays? Does anybody remember his stint with the Raiders? He gave up on entire seasons. I went 0-14 one year in Fantasy because of this guy. In a related story, it also appears he's given up on shaving.

Patriots 24-17


Arizona @ Detroit

Last week when I claimed that Ray Lewis would murder Matthew Stafford in their game I was unaware that Stafford wouldn't actually be playing. To be fair though, I'm pretty sure the reason he didn't play was that he read my picks and started suspecting that I might be right. Well, I'm not sure if he's supposed to start this week, but if he is, I see a Darnell Dockett choking in his future. (Stafford just decided to sit.)

Cardinals 27-16


Miami @ Tennessee

My Wacky Pick of the Week: There will not be a pass attempted in this game. You just watch ...

Titans 23-20


Cleveland @ Kansas City

I don't have confirmation, but I don't see how this one avoids being a Stinger. There have been a lot of contenders for "Worst Game of the Year," and this one looks pretty pathetic, but nothing can top Cleveland 6 Buffalo 3 from Week 5. I feel like that terrible game has been forgotten about, which is a shame. We must never forget that game, otherwise we learn nothing.

Chiefs 16-13


Houston @ St. Louis

Whoa, these Texans are getting good.

Texans 31-17


Atlanta @ New York Jets

Apparently the Jets have the best scoring defense in the league. Maybe I've unjustly written off the Jets for no reason. Oh wait, I remember the reason, their coach is a fat asshole.

Jets 20-13



Afternoon Games



Oakland @ Denver

Brandon Marshall was targeted something like 27 times last week (like I said last week, I'm not doing much research for this thing). That reminds me of someone playing Madden and just throwing to one guy every time because he knows he'll catch it. So my conclusion is that Kyle Orton is a cheap Madden player, which explains the Broncos 6-0 start; he was obviously just re-setting games when they lost.

Broncos 24-13


Cincinnati @ San Diego

Phillip Rivers just doesn't lose games in December, and I know why. We can all agree that Rivers seems like a real asshole, however, when December rolls around it seems like he just shuts his mouth and takes care of business. It's clear to me now that Phillips Rivers still believes in Santa Claus and he's trying to move from the naughty list to the nice list right around this time every year.

Chargers 30-20


San Francisco @ Philadelphia

I heard that Mike Singletary wants the Niners to challenge for a playoff spot, however, they can't because he already burned all their timeouts.

Eagles 28-17


Tampa Bay @ Seattle

Kind of weird to think that this was a Sunday Night game last year. I was happy with the Seahawks last week because they let it be known on the very first play that they wouldn't be winning the game. It really saved me a lot of stress.

Seahawks 28-18


Chicago @ Baltimore

I've got nothing ... um ... Cutler sucks?

Ravens 20-10


Green Bay @ Pittsburgh

This is a tough call, in fact, it might come down to the coin toss. After all, whichever quarterback gets the ball first might just hold it for the entire game.

Steelers 21-20



Sunday Night


Minnesota @ Carolina

Why could this game not have been flexed? Is it just because they think Favre will get ratings? I counted 3 games that should be better. (Bonus, if you correctly identify which 3 games I was talking about, there's a high five coming your way.)

Vikings 31-20



Monday Night



New York Giants @ Washington

You don't just come in to D.C. and leave with a win ... you also leave with increased confidence because they made you realize how good of a team you can actually be.

Giants 24-21


12.18.2009

WE DID IT!!!!

WE'RE FUCKING FAMOUS!!!!!



Check it out!!!

http://espn.go.com/chicago/specialFeature?page=1984cubs

Check out Henry's bio!!!!!

Honestly, we're so happy! We couldn't have done it with all you Mustacheers!

Wak has Plan for Milton Bradley

Once again, the M's rip off another team for talent trading Carlos Silva for Milton Bradley.  In case, you are concerned about the perception that Bradley is a clubhouse cancer, don't worry.  The M's feel Bradley's antics can be cured be a serious case of Griffey tickles.

12.16.2009

Jim Mora SUPER tough Guy

Another Jim Mora rant! Yay.

I'm getting real tired of Jim, (gonna drain his heat HHH style).

Questioning the Seahawks toughness? Probably warranted, cuz I haven't seen a lot of heart on this team either... other than MH of course. But Jim's act is getting real old.

What has he EVER done as a head coach? Falcons had one shining moment, but they ultimately sucked... and now this year is just pathetic.

I also really enjoy Jim's strategy of calling out his team the week before they play the worst teams in the league (Detroit last time, Tampa Bay this week). That way when we (hopefully) kick some ass against an (again... hopefully) inferior team, he looks like a motivational mastermind!!!! Nice try Jim. I don't buy it.

Me thinks, Jim has gotten by a little too much on his daddy's reputation. Maybe trying to get a little of that classic Jim Mora, Sr. press conference heat. So... Jim, JR... I've watched press conferences by Jim Mora, Sr. I've enjoyed press conferences from Jim Mora, Sr. You sir are no Jim Mora, Sr.

At least this time Jim called out an O-Lineman and not our kicker. Cuz calling out a kicker wouldn't be very TOUGH would it Jim.

Diagnosis?


Bad babysitting... oh sorry.

Fire Jim Mora. I dislike him.

12.15.2009

Avatar

I was speaking with some friends (I can't remember who) about Avatar, James Cameron's new holiday blockbuster. One funny chap made a joke about how it's just a bunch of our Yahoo! Fantasy Football characters (see the sports connection? We're a sports blog!) fighting it out (so if you made the joke take credit... it was funny). It got me thinking about the movie a little bit though.

Seems really familiar (South Park slams aside). I mean two different races/cultures battling it out over ruling a planet. The film itself relies HEAVILY on AMAZING CGI and computer animation. It all seems so familiar...

Where have I seen this before?

Oh... my... god...





DELGO!!!

Jimmy Cameron ripped off Delgo! He saw the market was unfulfilled by last years movie (would be) king... and struck! What a jerk.

The Delgo creator is gonna be kicking himself... I mean this is EXACTLY what would have happened with a marketing budget!!! (I'm assuming the movie will end up making a few hundred mil)

Anyway... Delgo... we know the truth. And we'll never forget!

12.14.2009

#4

I'll bet most of yous thought this list was over...

Well...



I didn't hear no bell.

#4 Rocky (the series)



Yeah, rather than list all the films individually... we decided to just group them. It may have helped it climb the list (or in 5's case, hurt it's cause).

Anyway, everyone knows the greatness of these films. The great montages, , Clubber Lang, Tommy Gunn (hey how'd you get in here), Thunder Lips, Mickey, Pauly, Adrianne, DRAGOOOOOOOOOOOOO, and the great Apollo Creed!

Which one hurts more? Goose or Apollo?

Here are some of my favorite clips from the Rocky Series (or at least my favorite clips I could find on YouTube)

Original Trailer:




Clubber's prediction for his fight:



APOLLO!



No easy way out:



Hearts on fire:




Cliff Lee is a Seattle Mariner!

for some Canadian junk. Everything you read on Twitter is true, right?

12.13.2009

Seahawks Game thread

Post your thoughts on the game here! Personally, I feel that...


we fucking suck. Fire every single person associated with the Seahawks, save maybe a dozen or so players. Honestly... WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!

Here's a fun game for all you Mustacheers to play: Last person to keep watching this game wins a free beer from me!

Have fun!

12.12.2009

NFL Picks Week 14

I haven't correctly predicted a score since Week 7. In a completely unrelated factoid, were you aware that 20-17 is the most common final score in the history of the NFL? It's happened 229 times so far, including 9 times already this season. Just thought I'd point that out, now let's get to the picks!


Morning Games


New Orleans @ Atlanta

Last week I predicted that New Orleans would lose, and they really should have, but this week I just can't see it happening. Matt Ryan and Michael Turner are out again this week ... I think. I don't know, I don't do any real research for this thing, in fact, I copy and paste most of it from other sites. Bill Simmons is a columnist for ESPN.com. For every S

Saints 20-17


Green Bay @ Chicago

A couple of hot young QBs set to do battle. It's anybody's guess as to which total will be higher: number of times Aaron Rodgers is sacked or number of times Jay Cutler throws an interception. I'll go with 9-7 Cutler.

Packers 20-17


New York Jets @ Tampa Bay

Rex Ryan keeps telling me the Jets are good, but I'm not sure I'm buying it. I think I'll take Tampa in an upset. (I've learned that acknowledging that your pick is an upset makes it seem brave and hopefully means people will cut you some slack when you're wrong.)

Buccaneers 20-17


Miami @ Jacksonville

Another Stinger from the good folks in Jacksonville. This one's pretty ridiculous. These teams are battling for the final wild card spot in the AFC, they play in the same state, and at halftime they're actually going to have a jaguar fight a dolphin. How did this game not sell-out?

Dolphins 20-17


Detroit @ Baltimore

I would not be surprised if Ray Lewis legitimately murders Matthew Stafford during this game. I'm thinking he shivs him after a sack and then shooshes Stafford's gasps of pain. It'll be a lot like Adam Goldberg's death scene in Saving Private Ryan.

Ravens 20-17


Seattle @ Houston

When I reviewed the Seahawks' 2009 schedule prior to the season on this very website I said this about our match-up with the Texans: "This is a tailor-made 'lay an egg' game for us, but since we'll be going 16-0 this season, we probably won't lose it." Well, that prediction hasn't failed me yet, so I guess I'll roll with it.

Seahawks 20-17


Denver @ Indianapolis

Is it me or do the Broncos always get killed when they play at Indy? Doesn't it just seem like this happens a lot? Look, just say yes, and we can move on. Anyway, it's time for that draft pick to get a little better.

Colts 20-17


Buffalo @ Kansas City

Hey Jacksonville, this game got sold out. That's how pathetic you are. Did anybody else see how bad the Chiefs, and in particular Cassel, looked last week in their 44-13 loss to the Broncos? I'm just kidding, of course no one saw that game.

Bills 20-17


Cincinnati @ Minnesota

Bust out the HD TVs for this one. It's Orange vs. Purple, which kind of sounds like a gang war on Castro Street. The Bengals have repeatedly stepped up in their toughest games this year ... nevermind, I guess I was just thinking about their 4-0 record against the Ravens and Steelers, which we now can plainly see are not good teams. That being said, I think they'll keep this one close.

Vikings 20-17


Carolina @ New England

It's a rematch of one of the more underrated Super Bowls of all time. Not because of the actual game, which was fine, but because of Jake Delhomme's "Cajun finger wave" that he gave to a New England defender who bumped him while he ran down the field to celebrate a touchdown pass (sorry, I couldn't find a youtube clip). I haven't checked officially, but I'm pretty sure that was the last touchdwon pass Jake Delhomme threw. Side note: as I typed "Super Bowl" I got to thinking that that was a really nerdy title for a game. It's such a great game that it's SUPER! What a Super Bowl indeed!

Patriots 20-17


Afternoon Games


Washington @ Oakland

This is the second Stinger of the day, even after the Raiders epic victory over the Steelers last week. Speaking of, I was at a bar last night and the bartender had a Raiders wristband and a tattoo of the logo. The follwoing exchange happened:

Me: Hey, Raiders, they've been playing better lately, what's the deal?
Bartender: They put in the white quarterback.

Hmmm. Sounds like this guy's been to his fair share of Heatherwood West fireworks shows.

Raiders 20-17


St. Louis @ Tennessee

Remember in Super Bowl (SUPER!) XXXII when Holmgren decided to let the Broncos score at the end of the game so that he could get the ball back? I get the feeling that it's going to look just like that every time Chris Johnson touches the ball in this game. And for my Wacky Pick of the Week: Chris Johnson breaks the single game rushing record.

Tennessee 20-17


San Diego @ Dallas

Tony Romo has decided to start holding for kicks again, which gives me the excuse to link to this video. Alright, fuck this game, a couple of things about that clip. It's a really good "disbelief cheer" from us (and I say us because 75% (3 out of 4) of the people who will read this were there). Secondly, I love when Shaun comes running in at the end of the play with his giant coat and no helmet on. That probably should have been a penalty huh? Oh well. Oh, right, the game, umm, the Cowboys don't win games in December right?

Chargers 20-17


Sunday Night


Philadelphia @ New York Giants

I never get tired of having the NFC East rammed down our throats in prime time. Maclin is out for the Eagles, and I actually think that will matter.

Giants 20-17


Monday Night


Arizona @ San Francisco

It's too bad all Niners fans don't read my weekly picks, if they did they wouldn't be so delusional and they'd realize their team sucks and their coach is a moron. Three timeouts in the first 10 minutes of the game? Cannot win with him, can't do it. I'm starting to think Coors Light paid off the 49ers to hire Mike Singletary because they needed some new commercials. Anyway, the Cardinals might be hitting their stride, and that's frightening because when they're at their best they can choke 4 to 5 throats per game.

Cardinals 20-17









12.09.2009

10 years... my god... where has it all gone?

It's time for one of HCM's favorite traditions:

Best of the Decade!

And just like always, we need your help...



Let's come up with a variety of topics to vote on (I know how much you clowns like intercative polls with bells and whistles to distract you from your pathetic little non-blogging lives).

Suggestions (Easy ones):

Favorite Mariner

Favorite Sonic

Favorite Seahawk

Favorite Cougar

Favorite Husky Disgrace

the list can go on and on... and it WILL!

Those are just a few we'll be doing... but any reasonable suggestions will be added to the list. Come up with the category and the Party Hosts will put together your voting options.

Let's get this started sooner rather than later! Post away Mustacheers! Whoa SLOW DOWN!!! Not all at once you maniacs!

12.08.2009

#5

There comes a time in every movie list where it has to turn and face the music. And that movie is....



you Kingpin.

#5 Kingpin



I'm fully aware that the intro made little to no sense... just trying to work a classic Big Ern McCracken line in.

Honestly... my head hurts from trying to come up with stuff to say about the flick.

I will never get tired of watching Big Ern hit on those broads in the diner. Big Ern fondeling women every chance her gets. Big Ern... now that I think about it, any of you younger Mustacheers might want to purchase a copy of this film and just follow Big Ern as your personal savior. Sometimes I wish I had. I'll bet things would've turned out a lot different. In FACT, I'm debating adding him to the illustrious list of HCM heroes! Any objections?



And I will certainly never get tired... of the showdown.



I'M BIG ERN! Finally BIG ERN IS ABOVE THE LAW!!!! Oh what do I care I'm RICH!!!

Sure I left a buuuuunch out, didn't even hit on tons of the great stuff here... I'll let the legions of Mustacheers participating in the countdown take it from here.

First person to make a "Munsoned" joke wins a free high five!

12.07.2009

Felix Contract

According to Jon Heyman, who just appeared on MLB Network, Felix's agent has asked for a new contract that is 6 years for $100 million. I think that's fairly reasonable and that the M's should probably go for it. Of course, this will probably result in Felix getting very complacent, gaining 40 lbs. and declining sharply over the next few years. Either way we're gonna have a little fun right!?

Anyway, what do you guys think about that offer?

12.05.2009

NFL Picks Week 13

Anybody here like football!? No? Really? Nobody here likes football? Wow that's surprising, but ok. Um, well this is gonna be weird then because this whole post is about football, so ....


Morning Games


Philadelphia @ Atlanta

How will the crowd react to the return of Michael Vick? Well I remember a televised town hall meeting in which the folks in Atlanta booed a PETA member for encouraging people to not forget that the dogs were the real victims in the Vick case. So, obviously it's a classy bunch and they'll handle things appropriately. The Falcons are 5-0 at home but they're missing Matt Ryan and probably Michael Turner, so ...

Eagles 27-16


St. Louis @ Chicago

I was planning on just going against Jay Cutler at all times, but he's playing the Rams for God's sake. I'd like to pick no one but I can't do that, I have too much integrity, and you readers care too much for me to pull something like that.

Bears 23-9


Detroit @ Cincinnati

If someone had told me at the beginning of the year that Lions-Bengals would be the most anticipated game of the season I probably would have said they were crazy. Well if someone told me that now I'd still say they were crazy, this game is going to be shitty.

Bengals 28-10


Oakland @ Pittsburgh

We could see a QB match-up of Bruce Gradkowski vs. Dennis Dixon in this one. That's funny enough by itself right? I don't need to write another fabulous joke do I?

Steelers 23-6


Tennessee @ Indianapolis

Probably the most interesting game of the day. If you're a loyal reader of this weekly post (you two know who you are) then you're well aware that I've been backing VY for the last 4 weeks, he's a pretty magical guy. But can I pick him against the Colts? A team that hasn't lost a regular season game since 2003 (sic)? The answer is yes, and you know why? Well I don't know, like I said he's magical, and I can't explain magic and if I tried to I'd get blacklisted.

Titans 22-21


Denver @ Kansas City

So I guess Denver decided to be good again last week? What happened there? No seriously what happened, it was the late game on Thanksgiving and I was pretty hammered and very sleepy so I didn't see much of the game. Anyway, this week Denver will go back to their mission of being the opposite Titans.

Chiefs 20-16


New England @ Miami

So do the Pats come out angry in this one or are they just not that good? Well, I think they're still decent enough, plus the Dolphins let me down last week. I thought I knew what to expect from them, but now I don't know ... I just ... I can't do this anymore.

Patriots 31-27


New Orleans @ Washington

Alright I'm back. New Orleans really looked unstoppable last week, which makes me really want to pick D.C. in this one. I mean the Saints have to lose at some point right? And this is a text book letdown game. But, it's the 'Skins, and they're really bad ... Ya know what, eff it! I'm doing it! Who's gonna stop me? You? Pssh, no, you're not gonna stop me, you're just gonna sit there with that stupid look on your face like you wanna say something but you ain't gonna say shit.

Redskins 23-20


Tampa Bay @ Carolina

Umm, I don't know ... Delhomme sucks ... That's funny right? I found out that Delhomme has the same birthday as me, he's really bringing down the day at this point.

Panthers 21-13


Houston @ Jacksonville

I think we've got our one and only Stinger of the week. Obviously I don't like the idea of moving teams out of cities, but if the Jags are in a playoff race and can't sell out any games they really shouldn't have a team in Jacksonville. Maybe there's something I don't know that's keeping fans away, but this just looks bad at this point. Sidenote, the Jags went ahead and proved that they weren't good last week. I've been saying it for weeks, thanks guys, I seem somewhat legitimate now.

Texans 27-20


Afternoon Games


San Diego @ Cleveland

I really don't even think the Browns like football.

Chargers 34-10


Dallas @ New York Giants

Here's my Wacky Pick of the Week! Smiles Austin gets all of his teeth knocked out rendering him unable to smile for the rest of his life. The nation weeps.

Giants 20-17


San Francisco @ Seattle

Hawks are riding a winning streak and they've got all the momentum in the world. Oh ... they're also playing the Niners, so it looks like another win is in store.

Seahawks 23-16


Sunday Night


Minnesota @ Arizona

This one is tough to pick because it's still unknown if Kurt Warner is going to play. If he plays I like the Cards, if he doesn't I like Jared Allen to literally kill Matt Leinart.

w/ Warner ... Cardinals 31-24 w/o Warner ... Vikings 28-14


Monday Night


Baltimore @ Green Bay

Have the Ravens played a normal Sunday game this year? I think it's been strictly Sunday nights and Mondays for them, I think they even played on a Friday somehow too. Anyway, the Ravens will win because Ray Rice is the best player in the history of the NFL, and great kisser, at least that's what Ray Lewis tells me.

Ravens 24-21




12.03.2009

Holgren as GM

If Holgren is named the new Seahawks GM, I suspect it will be because he just submits his 2002 draft selections in place of a resume to secure the job.


1/28Jerramy Stevens
2/54Maurice Morris
2/60Anton Palepoi
3/85Kris Richard
4/120Terreal Bierria
5/146Rocky Bernard
5/169Ryan Hannam
5/171Matt Hill
6/194Craig Jarrett
7/232Jeff Kelly

(Begin typing here for after the break) Let's all look forward to an even higher priority placed on character guys!

New Colors

To better support Cougar Basketball. The greatest thing ever.

12.02.2009

McRib


The McRib has returned to Southern California. This event may or may not result in me having to enter the 2010 Weight Loss Challenge. Speaking of challenges, are we still looking for someone to eat 5? If so, I feel up to the task. I just downed 2 in the span of about 5 minutes and feel like I could certainly go for more. I will state right now, however, that I will not eat pickles on any of the McRibs, if this violates the challenge then I guess I'll forfeit. (or I could just get extra onions to compensate)

Sidenote: They cost $2.60. That seems a little higher than normal. It comes out to about $15 with tax for 5 of them. A small price to pay for immortality I suppose.

12.01.2009

Weight Loss Challenge 2010

We're back baby!

HenryCotto'sMustache.com Weight Loss Challenge!



Who can forget last year's FUN!!!

Well apparently the two competitors forgot what they learned... cuz they're back and fatter than ever! And we're looking for new challengers! Any takers just step your fat ass up to the plate.

Bring it nancies.

The Top 5

Well we finally made Mustacheers!



Well... not quite. We'll announce 1 film each of the next 4 weeks and celebrate the new year with our #1 Greatest Sports Film of All Time!

Any guesses on the top 5? Ah, never mind... we don't wanna ruin it!