Lots of Posts in March...

So remember to check the side bar if you missed any of these steaming piles of shit I keep posting.... on the other hand if anyone missed Erik's latest (skipped over in the Seattle March Madness outrage)... it's a doozy:

http://www.henrycottosmustache.com/2009/03/new-book-accuses-miracle-team-of-ped.html

Ex-Mariner Game Continued

Not sure if people wanted to keep this going or not, but it got a lot of comments last time so here it is again...

Ex-Mariner Game... play however you want, or for extra difficulty points, try using the first letter of the last name to start the first letter of the next Mariner's first name. That make sense?

Here's an alphabetized list of everyone we used already. You can also do a CTRL+F and search to make sure they haven't been used yet.

Any fond memories about the players? Post away!

Thanks... here's the list so far:

AaronHeilman

Aaron Sele

Adam Jones

Alvin Davis

Ben Davis

Bill Risley

Billy Swift

Bob Wolcott

Bobby Ayala

Bret Boone

Brett Tomko

Bucky Jacobsen

Butch Huskey

Carl Everett

carlos guillen

Chad Meyers

Charles Gipson

Chris Bosio

Chris Snelling

Chris Widger

DannyTartabull

Darnell Coles

Dave Fleming

dave henderson

Dave Magadan

Doug Strange

Edgar Martinez

Erik Hanson

Freddy Garcia

Gaylord Perry

Gerald Perry

Glenallen Hill

Greg Briley

Greg Dobbs

Harold Reynolds

Heathcliff Slocum

Henry Cotto

Hiram Bocachica

Horacio Ramirez

Jamie Moyer

Jay Buhner

jeff nelson

Jim Presley

JJ Putz

John Halama

jose cruz jr

Jose Guillen

Julio Cruz

Kevin Mitchell

Mac Suzuki

mark langston

Mark Mclemore

Matt Thornton.

Matt Young

Miguel Cairo

Miguel Olivio

mike blowers

Mike Cameron

Mike Jackson

Omar Vizquel

Pat Borders

Paul Abbott

Paul Sorrento

Paul Spoljaric

Pete O'Brien

Phil Bradley

Quinn Mack

Randy Johnson

Rey Quinonez.

Rich Amaral

Richie Sexon

Ryan Franklin

Scott Bankhead

Scott Bradley

Scott Podsednik.

Scott Spiezio

Shane Monahan

Shigitoshi Hasagawa

Shin-soo Choo

Spike Owen

STAN JAVIER

Steve Trout

terry mulholland

Tim Belcher

Tino Martinez

Tom Lampkin

Vince Coleman

Willie Bloomqist

Seattle March Madness 2009

The much anticipated...

SEATTLE MARCH MADNESS 2009!!!!

Here is the bracket. Sorry the pictures blow... I'll get better for the individual matchups.

Here are the four regional brackets:

The Tuba Man Brackett:

























The Henry Cotto Bracket (otherwise we know he'd win):
























The Scott Kaloper Bracket:
























The Radio Personality Jason Puckett (RPJP) Bracket:























There you have it. I'm sure you all have your thoughts. Go ahead. Let's hear 'em. Matchups will begin tomorrow evening hopefully.

New Book Accuses "Miracle" Team of PED Use

ANAHEIM, LOS ANGELES, CA - "It’s time the truth came out." Ranch Wilder, former Angels broadcaster said Wednesday. Wilder’s new book "The Syringe Had Wings," which hits shelves next Tuesday is said to "blow the lid" on the miraculous Angels team that made an inspirational run to the pennant years ago. In his book, Wilder makes bold claims of rampant steroid use throughout the Angels clubhouse. "You don’t even have to look at the numbers," explained Wilder, "Just watch some of the game film. I mean what about that catch that (Ben) Williams made where he leapt about 12 feet in the air. Or how about in that very same game where (former Angels catcher, Triscuitt) Mesmer shattered his bat and still hit a home run. You’re gonna tell me these things are natural?"

No one is safe in Wilder’s scathing crusade, including beloved pitcher Mel Clark. "Clark was the most obvious case." Said Wilder, "You tell me how a 45 year-old pitcher who had been steadily declining for the last 5 seasons all of a sudden starts throwing like he’s Steve Nebraska."
Wilder’s book uncovers an intricate delivery system of the PEDs, which were referred to under the code name of "Angels." According to Wilder, the "angels" were provided by a local woman named Maggie Nelson who used an abandoned children’s halfway house as a front for a sophisticated drug ring. As if this wasn’t shocking enough, Wilder goes on to report that the steroids were delivered to the ballpark by the orphaned children themselves. The most frequent delivery person was a young boy named Roger who later confessed that the only reason he participated was because Nelson told him his father would take him back if the Angels won the pennant. Roger became such a regular guest of the team that he was even given front-row seats near the dugout so that he could more easily drop-off the banned substances. "Maggie Nelson is a sick individual who shamelessly involved children in her twisted drug empire," expounded Wilder, "She is really a despicable human being."

Wilder reports that the treachery didn’t stop with performance-enhancing drugs, claiming that the Angels resorted to other underhanded tactics such as drugging the opposition. Wilder claims that visiting teams’ food would be doped with mild tranquilizers, thus altering their play in a negative manner. "How else do you explain the Oakland A’s making 19 errors on one play?" Asked Wilder, in reference to an infield hit that resulted in an inside-the-park home run for soft-hitting utility man Danny Hemmerling.

When approached for comment, former Angels manager George Knox only said, "I’m not here to talk about the past. Besides, I’m not being honest with myself right now, so how do you expect me to be honest with you?"

March Madness / Mariners Baseball / HCM

We've got some exciting posts for the month's of March and April (and by we I mean me)... real cutting edge shit. So be on the lookout!

Also...

If anyone is gonna be up for watching the tourney games next Thursday and Friday, me and my broseph are taking the days off so we'll be livin' it up and um, watching the games! You're all invited!!!! If we actually know you. If you want to be a part of that just contact us.

Finally...

Tonight: The first look at Seattle Sports March Madness. The Bracket will be revealed. The premise: a 64 man (woman) tourney to determine the greatest of the great Seattle Sports figures. If you'd like to see someone included let me know here. The bracket is done, but I could make some changes I'm sure.

Be well.

Star-Studded Watchmen Screening

I went to see Watchmen in IMAX at my local cineplex earlier today. Joining me in the theater was Clippers super-player Chris Kaman. This marks the second time I've gone to the same movie as a gawky, white big-man. The first being a 2005 showing of The Ice Harvest at the Alderwood 16 that was attended by myself and Nick Collison. I gotta say I was way more excited for Collison. I mean, Kaman was wearing basketball shorts and a t-shirt. Pretty classless. Maybe he was worried that people wouldn't know that the 6'11" guy sitting in the handicapped row so that he can actually fit in a seat was a basketball player.






The real highlight, however, was when Rosario Dawson showed up.



She still stunk of Shuttlesworth.

Aron Baynes got screwed and at the very least should have gotten All Pac-10 Honorable Mention

Has Roeland Schaftenaar ever done this:

Shame on you ESPN

I just was checking ESPN.com (one of our fledgling competitors) and saw that they have the Thunder listed as one of my teams that I follow. BOO

Put on Your Red Shoes...

Let's Dance!
With their win today over Penn, paired with the loss by Princeton, Cornell has clinched the Ivy League title and become the first team to officially qualify for the tourney. This makes them the early favorite to win it all.

Keith, I'll meet you in Detroit.

March Madness

Let's all get crazy this March.

Join the official HCM March Madness pool. The winner will get one post of their own.

http://tournament.fantasysports.yahoo.com/t1

Group Name: HCM

Password: HCM

Group ID #27763

CRAZY!!!!!!!!!!

Necessary Roughness

Why would the University of Kansas allow it's school to be used in this movie?

Tony Gwynn: "He was throwing good..."

Over at the Hot Stone League, my boy Larry checks in with the boy who probably got away. We all remember that M's sweep of the A's that cost us Strasburg. Well it looks like he is off to a nice start to the season with San Diego State. In his last start he went 6 2/3 innings and had 16 Ks, hitting 102 MPH 7 times.

Inside Lorenzo Romar's Playbook

Many have wondered what it is that makes Coach Romar such an awesome coach. I had the luxury of tracking him down after his 3 point OT victory over ASU(despite the 4 point spread but we wont get into that). After each timeout, missed basket, or made basket, he seemed to be calling the same thing over and over again. I present to you how to break down ASU's zone D:

FLASH

Unfortunatley my paint.net skills will not allow me to replicate off balance prayers that dont come close to hitting the basket, let alone going in.

Combine: Defense

Monday was the first day at the Combine for the defense. DL and LBs went through the drills. In the interest of keeping the ex-Mariner Game near the top of the page, I will post my notes as a comment to this post. So, click through to read more.

Ex-Mariner Game

If you're cool you've already been playing this when you get drunk with amigos.

I'd really be happy if this got all sorts of neato comments.

HCM Rules:

1 - Name an Ex-Mariner that hasn't been listed already.
2 - One post per user per day

I'll get things started with the man... the myth... the legend... the grower of the world's greatest mustache...


HENRY COTTO!!!

2009 Combine: Offense

Three days of position drills have been completed at the 2009 Combine. With just the defensive backs left, it is time for a brief recap of the offensive positions and some things that stuck out over the past couple days (defensive recap will be posted tomorrow).

Saturday (OL and TE)
Obviously, the big story of the day was Andre Smith’s departure. He and his agent mishandled the situation and failed to inform the appropriate people. The guys on NFL Network seem to be split on how much this effect his stock. He will probably still go Top 10.

Jason Smith and Eugene Monroe both looked good in the drills on Saturday. Monroe put up disappointing bench press numbers, but that was the only knock on him. He looks to be the more complete and polished player of the two. Smith is a converted TE who is still learning the position and developing. The thought is that he has more potential than Monroe.

Michael Oher looked a bit stiff in some of the drills, but still pretty good. William Beatty (UConn) put up some good numbers and might be a tackle that sneaks into the first round if a run on tackles happens similar to last year. Jamon Meredith (So Car) looked like the most athletic tackle out there.

With Alex Mack not participating, the two top centers were Max Unger (Oregon) and Eric Wood (Louisville). They both looked impressive. I still think Mack is the #1, but there probably won’t be much separation between the three.

I won’t spend too much time on the Tight Ends, because I figure it’s one of the only positions the Hawks are set at. Brandon Pettigrew did nothing to hurt his status as the #1 TE. His 40 time was slow, but people weren’t expecting it to be much better. Jared Cook (So Car) looked like the best athlete out there, but not much of a blocker (according to Mike Mayock). Shawn Nelson (So Miss) also showed his athleticism, but is apparently a “willing blocker” and can be taught better techniques.

Sunday (WR, RB, QB)
The big news for this group was the Crabtree foot injury. The receivers who actually participated put up some good numbers. Maclin ran a 4.46, which is good but not as fast as I thought he would be. He landed a little funny during one of the drills and is having an MRI done on his knee. It’s not expected to be too serious.

The fastest 40 time was run by Darrius Heyward-Bey (4.3). This should cement him in the first round. Percy Harvin ran 4.41, but scouts wanted to see him take part in route-running drills, which he did not do. There is still some concern as to how he can be used in NFL schemes. Mike Wallace (Ole Miss) and Mike Thomas (Arizona) both looked good and ran well.

The receiver I was most impressed by was Brian Robiskie (Ohio State). He is almost 6’3” and weighed in at 209lbs. He ran a 4.51, looked good in all the drills, and caught everything thrown to him. Most impressive: he is a gifted athlete who is also a student of the game. Hopefully he would be there for the Hawks in the 2nd round if they pass on Crabtree.

NFL Network’s coverage of the RB drills was a bit weak, or maybe I somehow missed half of it. Beanie Wells ran a 4.57 and looked really uncomfortable doing so. He also took about six attempts to land his broad jump. And before each jump he would wag his arms back and forth for like 30 seconds. Very annoying. I would move him down my draft board just for wasting time. Moreno ran a 4.63. Mayock’s concern is if he can run away from people. Marshall Faulk added that he can run that time for 4 quarters, so even though it’s not too fast, he doesn’t wear down as the game goes on. Bernard Scott from Abilene Christian has attended 4 schools and been arrested 5 times. He would be a big reach for the Bengals at #6, but they’ll probably take him in the 4th or 5th round.

Stafford decided not to throw at the Combine, but Sanchez did. He looked fine on the limited number of throws I saw. If anything, I like him more now because he threw. It’s lame that Stafford didn’t.

I was pretty impressed by Pat White. He made some very nice throws (“a catchable ball”) and ran a 4.49. He did not go through the receiver drills here, but will at his pro day. If he can show the ability to play the receiver position, I would think he’d jump up many teams’ draft boards. He could factor into a team’s wildcat formation. Wildcat.

Check back tomorrow for notes on the defensive players.

WSU QB Suspended

http://www.kxly.com/Global/story.asp?S=9890166&nav=menu683_5

We knew he wasnt strong enough to carry the entire team on his shoulders, but it looks like he was kinda strong.

2009 Academy Awardards, a complete travesty.

I'm watching the Oscars right now... apparently I didn't pay enough attention to the nominees but...


DELGO WAS SHUTOUT!!!!!!

What the FRACK?!?!?

Griffey's Back!

Not sure if anyone had noticed.

Let's Mock

With the Scouting Combine upon us, and position drills beginning tomorrow, I feel like it is an appropriate time to unveil my initial 2009 Mock Draft. This will definitely change over the next two months, but this is how it might play out based on my findings and what I hear from my sources.

1. Detroit Lions - Matthew Stafford (QB, Georgia)
I don’t think they should take him. He has bust written all over him. Not many underclassmen QBs seem to succeed. Plus, he won’t have much talent around him for a couple of years. I would take one of the top LTs or trade down (not likely). They shouldn't worry too much about blowing this pick since they'll get another chance in a year.

2. St. Louis Rams – Eugene Monroe (T, Virginia)
The Rams should go with an OT at #2. For some reason I feel like Eugene Monroe will end up being the #1 after it’s all said and done. Guys from Virginia seem to rise leading up to the draft. It seems like UVa has a guy in the Top 5 every year, but they’re always a mediocre team. Al Groh must be a sucky coach.

3. KC Chiefs – Aaron Curry (LB, Wake Forest)
Chiefs could upgrade at almost any position. They’re switching to a 3-4 defense, so they might as well get a LB. People say Curry is the safest pick in the draft, which would be better than gambling on Mark Sanchez. Plus, Steve DeBerg isn’t that bad of a QB. He’s a good game manager and they can win some close games with Curry, Dorsey, and Derrick Johnson anchoring the defense for years to come.

4. Seattle Seahawks – Michael Crabtree (WR, Texas Tech)
At first I didn’t want the Hawks to take Crabtree, but I am coming around on the idea. I don’t think the receiving corps is quite as bad as the national media does, but it does need to be improved (especially if Engram is not back). Now, he’s not 100% yet, so he won’t run at the Combine, but he is training with Michael Johnson (so he’ll be the fastest man alive once he is healthy). Other possibility is BJ Raji (DT, Boston College). I wouldn’t be too opposed to that pick. But it's always a little iffy when a guy’s stock leaps up during the postseason. I don’t think anyone would have had him this high until he wowed the scouts at Senior Bowl practices. That scares me.

5. Cleveland Browns – Everrette Brown (DE/OLB, FSU)
Cleveland needs to improve their pass rush. Their sack totals last year were pathetic. Eric Mangini looks like an idiot for taking Vernon Gohlston last year, so now he’s going to try and right his wrong with his new team. And yes, I am assuming that fat joke has 100% authority over the team’s draft.

6. Cincinnati Bengals – BJ Raji (DT, Boston College)
They could go with an OT since they desperately need one, but they also need some playmakers on the DL. I think they’ll consider Raji a better value (cuz they’re idiots).

7. Oakland Raiders – Jeremy Maclin (WR, Missouri)
Assuming he runs his 40 as fast I think he will, Al Davis will point to Maclin’s picture on draft day.

8. Jacksonville Jaguars – Jason Smith (T, Baylor)
The Jaguars would love to get someone to replace the homeless man that Khalif Barnes paid to impersonate him last year.

9. Green Bay Packers – Andre Smith (T, Alabama)
I feel like Smith's stock will continue to drop. Most mocks have Green Bay going with a CB, such as Malcolm Jenkins. In mine, they are able to get one of the top 3 tackles (better value) because the Bengals, as mentioned previously, are idiots.

10. San Francisco 49ers – Brian Orakpo (DE, Texas)
I thought about having them take Mark Sanchez just so I could feel better about playing them next year, but they should take Orakpo. I could see them going OL or WR if one of the top guys fell to them. I think they’ll take Orakpo here if he can show the ability to line up at both DE and OLB. His performance at the Combine should prove that.

11. Buffalo Bills – Aaron Maybin (DE/OLB, Penn State)
Could go with Brandon Pettigrew (TE, Okla St), but I think they can get a TE in the 2nd round and use this pick to improve their pass rush.

12. Denver Broncos – Rey Maualuga (ILB, USC)
Denver needs to improve their run defense. He can fill the gaps, take on blockers, and lay the wood better than anyone else in the draft. I’m not going to elaborate on the Broncos’ needs unless a certain someone makes his return to the Stache.

13. Washington Redskins – Michael Oher (T, Ole Miss)
This could be a bit of a reach, but I really like Oher and the Redskins need help on the line.

14. New Orleans Saints – Malcolm Jenkins (CB, Ohio State)
The Saints would likely make this pick based on value alone. Probably will not last this long.

15. Houston Texans – Brian Cushing (OLB, USC)
I actually think Cushing could be the Combine MVP who blows it up and then leaps up into the Top 10.

16. San Diego Chargers – Beanie Wells (RB, Ohio State)
With Sanchez still on the board, the Chargers might be able to find some trade partners who want to get ahead of the Jets. Possibly the Vikings, Bucs, or Lions if they go with someone other than Stafford at #1. Wells makes sense here if they get rid of one of their other backs.

17. New York Jets – Mark Sanchez (QB, USC)
The Jets will gladly take Sanchez and he will go on to be their QB of the future until they realize he’s not ready to start in the NFL. I wonder if the Jets fans at the Draft would boo this pick?

18. Chicago Bears – Tyson Jackson (DE, LSU)
Um, I got nothing

19. Tampa Bay Buccaneers – Vontae Davis (CB, Illinois)
I don’t think they’ll reach for Josh Freeman (QB, Kansas State). They should go with a solid CB prospect who can replace Ronde Barber when he decides to do television.

20. Detroit Lions – James Laurinaitis (ILB, Ohio State)
He could act as the anchor of their defense for the next 10 years. Interesting note: his father was The Animal from Legion of Doom fame.

21. Philadelphia Eagles – Knowshon Moreno (RB, Georgia)
A nice compliment to Brian Westbrook. I would love for the Hawks to somehow get their hands on Moreno. I think he’s going to be one of the best players to come out of this draft. Plus, his touchdown against Florida two years ago set off one of the greatest TD dances of all-time.

22. Minnesota Vikings – Eben Britton (T, Arizona)
This would be a reach based on their need for help on the O-line. They might be interested in Freeman here.

23. New England Patriots – Larry English (DE/OLB, No. Illinois)
If English can prove that he can play standing up he’ll be a good pick to improve the Pats pass rush.

24. Atlanta Falcons – Brandon Pettigrew (TE, Oklahoma State)
They would probably like to get a DE or DT here, but the best value would be Pettigrew who would also fill a need. Maybe they can get the line help next year when they’re picking much higher.

25. Miami Dolphins – Hakeem Nicks (WR, North Carolina)
Percy Harvin might be rated higher, but Ted Ginn Jr is already there as a WR/KR. Nicks is slowing getting more attention especially after his highlight reel catches in UNC’s bowl game.

26. Baltimore Ravens – DJ Moore (CB, Vanderbilt)
The Ravens have limited depth at cornerback and they just released McAllister (I think). Although Alphonso Smith (CB, Wake Forest) might be a more likely pick because of his ball skills and play-making ability.

27. Indianapolis Colts – Peria Jerry (DT, Ole Miss)
The Colts need help at the position and Jerry seems to be moving up people’s boards.

28. Philadelphia Eagles – Darrius Heyward-Bey (WR, Maryland)
They would like to add an OT, but there’s not one worth this pick. They might reach for Beatty (UConn) or Meredith (S Carolina), but I think they’ll try and trade down. If not, I guess Heyward-Bey makes sense because he would be another young receiver to help the passing game. If Andy Reid has his way he’ll probably select a pepperoni pizza. HAHAHAAHAHAHA!!

29. New York Giants – Clint Stintim (OLB, Virginia)
I think the Giants could use help at this position. The real reason I have them taking Stintim is because I know nothing about him and didn’t want to give the Giants a cool player. If there are any draft-eligible players currently sleeping with anyone in Coughlin’s family then that will be the obvious pick (see Chris Snee, 2004).

30. Tennessee Titans – Percy Harvin (WR, Florida)
Name a receiver on Tennessee’s roster. Nope, he’s not there anymore. Plus, he only played for the Oilers, not the Titans (I’m assuming you all said Haywood Jeffries). Harvin might go much sooner than this.

31. Arizona Cardinals – LeSean McCoy (RB, Pitt)
It seems like every mock draft has this pick, so I just went with it. McCoy has lost weight recently after contracting the flu. I think he read the same mocks as me and became physically ill with the idea of playing for Arizona.

32. Pittsburgh Steelers – Some Cheater (WR/QB, Lucky State)
Actually they’ll probably take Alex Mack, but only if Clarissa Darling is off the board.

This would leave some interesting possibilities for the Seahawks early in the 2nd round. I left Clay Matthews (LB, USC) out of the first round, but he might go in the Top 20. My choice would be Alphonso Smith, but he is another guy who will probably end up in the first round. There are still the top safeties and some quality OTs. One other possibility would be Josh Freeman. That’s what I have for now. Check in on Monday and Tuesday for Combine notes.