6.22.2009

Other

Last week I stumbled upon something so egregious and atrocious that looking at it almost made me physically ill. No, it wasn't John Lackey's face; instead it was:




Sports Illustrated's list of the "50 Greatest Sports Movies of All-Time."




I put the name of their list in quotes because, in actuality, this list is nowhere near what would be considered by sane human beings to be the best sports movies of all-time. As we all know, Major League is the best sports movie ever. And it would be natural to assume that SI felt the same. However, they did not give it the top spot, nor did they give it a spot at all. That's right, they left Major League off the list of the 50 Greatest Sports Movies of All-Time! I honestly had to check it 3 or 4 times just to make sure I didn't miss it, but no, it's not on there.




According to SI, Major League isn't quite as good as gems like:

-Searching for Bobby Fischer



-Rollerball




-Remember the Titans &


-Any Given Sunday





Not to mention about ten movies I'd never heard of, including one called: The Goalie's Anxiety at the Penalty Kick. Catchy title.


This list also contributes to the glorification of two of the most overrated sports movies ever: Slapshot and Hoosiers (5th and 6th, respectively). Look, I've got no problem with either of these flicks, they're both pretty solid, but they're definitely not as great as everybody seems to think they are. Slapshot is mildly funny, but certainly not the raucous laughfest I was led to believe; and, needless to say, it's nowhere near Major League in terms of outright hilarity. As for Hoosiers, I don't know, I guess I just didn't get it. After watching it, I couldn't see why anybody would think it's the best sports movie of all-time, unless you were an Indiana high school basketball player, or lame ... which I guess go hand-in-hand (Zing! Take that Indiana high schoolers, you effing losers!)

Here's another problem, they ranked Caddyshack 17th and left Rudy off the list altogether. Caddyshack is what Slapshot wishes it was (even though I think the latter was released a couple years earlier). And how can you leave Rudy off the list!? Inexcusable. Look, I don't cry while watching movies, but I'll tell you that after Rudy makes the sack and Roc starts to walk away and gives the little fist pump, well I was fighting 'em back.

After looking at this list and regaining my compsure I checked to see who had compiled this crime against humanity so that I could seek him out and start booing him constantly for at least 2 weeks. Then I found out that the list was put together by the "SI Staff." What!? There were multiple people sitting around and NONE of them saw fit to include Major League!


I'm cancelling my subscription.

24 comments:

EP said...

Someone needs to be held accountable for this. This is unforgivable. Quick question- Was Mr. Baseball on the list?

Erik said...

No, it wasn't. Also a glaring ommission. Those guys must have something against Dennis Haysbert.

I included a link if you want to see the whole list, just click on the underlined "50 Greatest Sports Movies of All-Time."

Pete said...

And the fact that Best in Show is on there is just plain stupid. I am a big fan of that film and like it more than the majority of the ones on the list, but how can they even justify it as a sports movie? What idiots. SI is worthless. They're such fucking amateurs.

Mr. F said...

So SI made a list of sports movies? Oooooohh GOOOOOOOOD FOR YOU!!!

Seriously. What a fucking joke. For all the reasons listed above. I'm not even gonna read the list.

Fuck them.

Erik said...

Just to clear up any confusion, the list came out in 2003. This doesn't change a thing though, Major League was just as good then as it is now.

Also, I didn't include it in the original post but I gotta say, I'm a big fan of Little Big League. Yes, the story is ridiculous, but the baseball scenes and situations are actually very good. Not to mention the final scene in which the M's beat the Twins (SPOILER ALERT! Whoops, I guess that was too late)

Julian said...

Major League deserves to be on that list. It's probably not on their because it's too dirty and some idiot like Sarah Palin would get upset if their kid saw it.

Let's get a HCM 50 greatest sports movie list...

Mr. F said...

Um, yeah, ok. That's brilliant. I'll get right on that. Seriously.
Mustacheers, go ahead and email me your suggestions, we might include them. Might not. Party hosts... I will contact you shortly.

jimi said...

Bend It Like Beckham, The Next Karate Kid, Eddie, Blue Crush, Cutting Edge, Bring it On, Bring it On All or Nothing, Bring it On In it to Win it, Major League

Mr. F said...

I meant email me them so it could be more of a surprise.

Bobby said...

I dont normally agree with you guys... but when I do I drink Dos Equis.

What a terrible list... Other terrible omissions: Miracle on Ice, Mystery Alaska, CINDERELLA MAN, Million Dollar Baby, and SANDLOT.

Terrible

EP said...

I'll speak for any golfers out there and say- Tin Cup, The Greatest Game Ever Played, and most importantly, Dead Solid Perfect.

Mr. F said...

Can any of you idiots read?

EP said...

Do you want participation on this blog or not?

Mr. F said...

Of course I do. But we'd like to keep the element of surprise with the list. Emails would work better in this case.

Erik said...

Bateman, most of the ones you suggested were made after the list was released. So, they may very well have been on there if the list came out today. But then again SI doesn't know what the fuck they're talking about, so probably not.

jimi said...

how about the surprise being where they end up on the list. Any guesses at number one?

Mr. F said...

I've got a a pretty good idea who's gonan win.

Let's just say it rhymes with Tool Cunnings.

Bobby said...

whoops just saw the whole "after 2003" thing. But that doesnt excuse Sandlot. That is considered a sports movie, correct?

Mr. F said...

Yeah, yeah.

EP said...

Are we supposed to email our top 50? That will take some research....

Mr. F said...

nah, just ones you'd like to considered.

wanamaker said...

Do you want participation on this blog or not?

wanamaker said...

Can any of you idiots read?

wanamaker said...

Just to clear up any confusion, the list came out in 2003. This doesn't change a thing though, Major League was just as good then as it is now.

Also, I didn't include it in the original post but I gotta say, I'm a big fan of Little Big League. Yes, the story is ridiculous, but the baseball scenes and situations are actually very good. Not to mention the final scene in which the M's beat the Twins (SPOILER ALERT! Whoops, I guess that was too late)